Michelle's surreal summer
By Andy Hall
On the one hand, she lost. She finished seventh seventh out of thousands, but seventh nevertheless. There are not many stories of seventh-place finishers coming out of Athens these days, unless they are of the failure of someone expected to finish first or of the success of someone who overcame great personal adversity just to finish seventh.
On the other hand, she won. Yes, this was a competition (of sorts) and yes, she finished seventh but not before making seven national television appearances for which she was flown all over the country (and into Canada), provided with meals, hotel and limousine service, not to mention a stipend for her trouble.
And she may yet realize her dream of becoming a World Wrestling Entertainment personality, be it "diva" or wrestler.
Yes, Michelle McCool Alexander was dismissed from the Monday Night Raw Diva Search the fourth out of 10 finalists to go but it seems they kept her phone number.
"Right before the elimination (Monday night), Stephanie emphasized that as the numbers get smaller, we might be hearing from them later with a contract offer," she said.
"Stephanie" would be Stephanie McMahon, daughter of WWE owner/king Vince McMahon and producer of the "diva search" segments in which McCool-Alexander appeared over the last several weeks traveling to New York, Washington, Pittsburgh, San Antonio, Cleveland and Toronto before her dismissal on Monday's show from London, Ontario. Save New York, she had never been to any of those places before taking a chance and applying online for the $250,000 Monday Night Raw Diva Search.
Most of all, the last few weeks have been surreal for a 24-year-old Palatka school teacher who comes from one of the town's most athletic families she is a former Putnam County Player of the Year (volleyball), as were brother Jeff (football) and cousins Matt (baseball), Jini (softball) and Lee (baseball) and the only "diva" contestant without an agent and without whose resume did not contain the words "model" or "actress."
Surreal. What word better describes a real-life experience in the unreal world of professional wrestling?
She's one of the millions "and MILLIONS," as The Rock might say who didn't have to wait for WWE to admit that its product was "sports entertainment" and not actual competition. She grew up watching it with her dad Terry McCool, the associate superintendent of Putnam County schools and remembers running around her house yelling "WOOOOOOOO!" a la pro wrestling icon Ric Flair.
And there she is, all of a sudden, chatting with Ric Flair as something of an equal a fellow performer on Monday Night Raw.
"I'm in the makeup chair having a conversation with Ric Flair and I'm like, Is this happening?'" she said. "I've always loved Ric Flair. He was just hilarious (backstage). He's always got something funny to say.
"Trish Stratus is hilarious. She's so down-to-earth. And Nidia she came by the dressing room and just wanted to hang out. Someone who's really nice is Rhyno. And Chris Jericho goes out of his way to talk to you and make you feel comfortable. I could go on and on."
(The assumption is made here that those who realized the subject was professional wrestling have long since high-tailed it out of this column and that the rest of you are familiar with Trish Stratus and Nidia and Rhyno and Chris Jericho.)
"A lot of people don't understand that they're actors and these are their characters. They really are like one big family backstage," said McCool-Alexander, who repeatedly praised WWE's professionalism and hospitality.
For instance, Triple H part-time world champion, full-time heel character and Stephanie McMahon's husband was among those who personally offered McCool-Alexander encouragement after her dismissal, only to go to the ring 20 minutes later and turn on the new world champion and his comrade in "Evolution," Randy Orton.
The aforementioned Nidia was one of the four current WWE divas McCool-Alexander eliminated in a wicked performance Sunday during "diva dodgeball" last Sunday at the SummerSlam pay-per-view event in Toronto. It called for actual athletic ability and thus was her favorite diva segment by far.
"I wish I could have nailed six girls instead of four," she said. "I thought the girl who got the most real divas out should have gotten some sort of immunity (from being released via fan voting), but obviously I didn't."
In any event, dodgeball was a welcome contrast from attempting to "tame" the savage beast in Kamala (an all-but-forgotten WWE character brought out of mothballs for one skit) or the ice cream sketch in which McCool-Alexander actually tried to sell an ice cream cone on its merits rather than following another contestant's lead and wearing the ice cream, so to speak.
Yes, the competition called for more than a few appearances in a bikini and heels, but there were areas McCool-Alexander was not going to go for fan votes in her bid a one-year $250,000, WWE contract. "I don't regret anything. I didn't compromise my morals or my principals," she said.
And the feedback has been purely positive back home. "I've gotten nothing but support from the people in Palatka," McCool-Alexander said. "Even now, they're like, Don't give up.'"
She's not sure who she wants to win now, maybe Christy ("the redhead people either like her or they don't"), but she's considering flying out to Seattle for the Sept. 13 show at which the winner will be determined.
Who knows? Maybe she'll turn up again on Monday Night Raw to exact her revenge on the diva who got "her" $250,000.
"Hopefully, this won't be the last time I work with them," she said. "We'll see."
Andy Hall is sports editor of the Palatka Daily News.
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