Social-ish-ness

...
big talk.
Two parts, the first is more vital.



Earlier I tried to stick to only commenting on the game itself, but with the person running the game feeling socially wounded and so many players emotionally hurt, we have to resolve these things first.
I'll try to help.

I know I'm just "Rachel's little brother."
I know I'm only 16.
I know I've only even been in LARP for a year and pretty much nobody really knew anything about me before that.
I know I'm not in your social circle.
I know I'm not in a position to judge.
I know I'm not aware of what is going on between people.
But I still have a voice.
I'm still here.
Furthermore, perhaps this gives me an edge. I have an outside perspective, but I've still gotten to watch people, see them, for a while, if only at game and Denny's.

The current situation? Here's what I see:
Nick and Jason cause problems in game. Jim finally gets fed up and (perhaps mellowdramatically -- I wasn't there, I don't know) pretty much kicks 'em out of game, to their acceptance. They start a new game. Jim hears about the coup and is hurt -- rightfully so -- but chooses to cope by taking refuge in the fact that people will stay with him, starting to form a "two sides" sort of thing. Warning lights flash, Gary and Mike speak up, but while people hear them, no one listens.
Nick and Jason show up for the next game. I dunno why -- maybe they were making amends. Either way, if they came back with apologies, Jim never heard them, and when Bill suggested that Jim's ruling to remove them from game. Jim, who had already forsaken any relationship with Jason and Nick, is wounded at Bill's countering the proposal and see's Bill as taking "sides" with Nick and Jason on the battlefield in his mind.
I don't know what people are doing know, except for this: Gary is doing what he can to stay neutral. And I'm not playing in ANY game until there's some resolution. I'll still talk to everyone if I get a chance, and I'm eager to play again. I'm not pulling a mellowdramatic departure. I'm just afraid that if I go to a game, I'll be percieved as on a "side." I don't want to be on a side.



If that's all you feel like reading, stop now.
Here's what else I have to say:


Okae.
I want to second what Gary said above... Rachel Gary and I do tend to agree, and our characters have ended up working as a bit of a unit, but that doesn't mean we're just a clump of player.

Rachel is my sister.
Gary... I wouldn't know for certain if he considers me a friend, but I like him. He's a great guy with good character.
Most of the people in the game, Bill and Steve included, seem to give me very little thought. I'm not hurt by that. I understand it. Again... Just Rachel's little brother. Bill seems to consider me a bit more, but that may well be simply because I played a vampire for so long.
Chris I don't know very well, but I like him. Even if he is a bit misguided about the nature of the supernaturals. I know he takes me more seriously as a member of the game than most -- he didn't know I was just a kid at first, and I've helped him with his characters... I've been one of his biggest aids, so he wouldn't see me as so inconsequential. Shrug
If I am wrong about anyone, my apologies. I am doing my best not to make assumptions, and if I have, I did not mean to. I am unhurt by anyone, I don't have any wish to make a drama. I could say "Woe is me for I am ignored as a mere minor in a game of adults" but that wouldn't do anything.

And then... there's Jim.
Jim I didn't write about above cuz he gets this paragraph.
I talked to Jim online before I joined the game.
I think he felt some sort of kindred spirit with me or something once because I was getting so aquanted with the rules and the drama and the concept of the game, since I did not have the chance to play yet.
Jim, I'm pretty sure, considers me a friend. Maybe not a close one, but a friend. I return the sentiment. I like Jim.
I'm not saying Jim is perfect. None of us are. I'm an annoying, hyper, rule-obsessed 16 year old.
Jim is creative, willing to spend the money on the game, willing to introduce plot ideas, willing to spend the time on the site, and even if people don't show him respect, people usually do, in the end, follow his rulings (bitching notwithstanding). Jim is also a mellowdramatic person who stands in all of his relationships with one foot out the door.
1) Jim is mellowdramatic -- most actors are. There's a point at which it's really bad, though, and I think we're getting to it. The mellowdrama isn't crippling on its own, but if he lets it control him, it becomes so. I hope he can get it in control. I really do.
2) Jim's "keep an escape route" approach to relationships. I remember when he expressed an interest in my sister (no I don't mean to bring up past qualms and if any start I'll be very pissed) hearing something about how he likes Rachel because she was honest with him -- how most girls he liked would accept his kindness but not give a rat's ass about him. I dunno if that happened. If it did, it would be a damn good reason for Jim to keep a watchful eye on those he gets to know. However... I wish he'd see that we're (almost all of us, if not all) people who really do like him. We might bitch, but we're his friends.


The reason I said so much about Jim is this:
There's a conflict, and jim is involved big time. I might not be involved enough to know about everybody's relationships, but I have gotten to know Jim. Or so I think. He's a good guy, but he has some flaws. I thought that by bringing up what I know about him, I might help.
I wrote the flaws I percieve in him not to attack him, to show a weak spot to be attacked, or to take any side -- I did it so that, if he decided I was right, he could try to fix it. I did it so that, should someone's association with Jim have come across those flaws without addressing them or without the person realizing them, so that the person might take a look and see how these flaws might have caused problems.





-Richard
~I am a wanderer... and I must continue wandering."