Chapter 38
“I despise you,” Paul said when Brian called him back.
“Okay, either I did something or didn’t do something. Which is it?”
“For one thing, when I am trying to teach my girls that fighting is not the answer to resolving conflict, not to mention they shouldn’t be doing stuff they see on TV, don’t be telling them to kick people’s asses when they get shit. I let you slide on the sex talk thing, but this is crossing the line, dude. Mac got in trouble at school for fighting with another girl.”
“That’s my baby,” Brian said cheerfully.
“No she isn’t. Dude, you’re lucky no one was seriously hurt, because if they were, I’d ripped your head off and had Phil use the hole left behind for a Pepsi can recycle bin. What the hell are you trying to do, turn my daughters into savages? Again, these are my kids. Not yours.”
“Hey, no skin off my ass if you turn Mac into a wuss and she gets stuffed into a locker for hours.”
“It wasn’t Mac that was being picked on. She was standing up for another kid.”
“Wow, so much the better.”
“You are not helping here, Spanky. Thanks to your warped sense of values being instilled into my kid, I have to spend tomorrow with her teacher and principal, most likely to convince them I am not raising buffoons and to keep her from being expelled. And if she gets expelled, you’re going to be the one dealing with mi mami.”
“That bad?”
“Yeah, that bad. Have you forgotten she’s in a Catholic school this year?”
“Catholic school? What did that poor kid do to deserve going to a place where she’ll have her knuckles rapped by nuns?”
“Nuns don’t do that shit anymore. And second, Mami offered to pay to send Mac there so she’d get a decent education rather than a half assed one in the public system. Needless to say, once Kira finishes kindergarten, they’re both getting home schooled. But since that won’t be for another year or so, I’d like to see Mac not get a reputation as a female beast that got thrown out of every school known to man in the meantime.”
“Okay, no more telling her to kick anyone’s ass.”
“Good boy. You can spend time with them, but no more of this bullshit. Leave their raising to me and Montana. When you have your own kids, teach them the ways of the jungle. Leave my two out of that.”
Later:
“So how did everything go? Did you let your best man live?” Montana asked.
“Yeah, this time,” Paul replied. “I think we finally came to an understanding that I am the father and the kids are to be raised by me.”
Montana raised an eyebrow.
“Until the wedding of course,” he hastily added. “Then it will be you and me.”
“Nice save there, padre,” she grinned. “Can you believe it’s only two weeks away?”
“Yeah, and it’s going to be a challenge to get the two sprouts settled down the night before, being the rehearsal dinner and all.”
“More like getting you settled down after all the night before festivities,” she smiled.
“You mean you know about…..” Paul began.
“The bachelor party and the two strippers Brian hired,” Montana laughed. “And it’s perfectly fine.”
“Wow, does this mean you won’t be chopping off my balls?”
“Why would I do that? It’s just a bachelor party. My friends and I are having a little thing; why can’t you let loose with your buddies?”
He cleared his throat. “I was kind of worried there for a moment, being I heard that Tasha was all but ready to emasculate Sly for having one at his.”
“Well, I’m not Tasha. Enjoy yourself. But if you run off with one of those strippers, we will have a serious issue.”
“You won’t have to worry about that. Hell, if anyone ends up in trouble, it will most likely be Spanky. Or at your get together, I’m betting on Mimi.”
“For some reason, I agree with you on the Mariah part. She’s a party animal; no lie there.”
“Did I mention that I am madly in love with you?”
“I hope so; you’re the one that proposed, remember?”
“Yeah, too bad it was kind of half assed. But I was never a guy to–”
“Come here, you,” Montana said, pulling him into a hug. “If I wanted a Mr. Fancy Pants, I’d gone out and found one. But I got you and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Besides, it‘s the thought that counted. And how could I look into those eyes and say no?”
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