You've gotten some good advice from other ladies, and I'd add...
What human being could ever attempt this without feeling nervous, anxious? DE demands SO MUCH from us! Your anxiety is normal. My cycle was postponed sooooo many times (because it seemed the donor could not follow directions, poor communication between the donor/clinic/agency, etc.) that I needed to take Ambien in the weeks prior to the cycle. What I really needed was Xanax, but they only gave me sleeping pills. Would it help you to ask your MD/RE for some pills to take the edge off?
You need to dive in head first, knowing that DE really does dramatically increase your chances. Not sure how many failures you've had with OE or DE, but I know how hard it was for me to compartmentalize the past and move forward with this new option.
Just do it. And take comfort in the fact that you will survive this.
Let us know how you make out.