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Another dumb question: Do you have unprotected sex during cycles (Downs & misc ment)

April 13 2011 at 12:04 PM
Orchid  (Login arive)


Response to OT: Scared to get a mammogram

 
There's a part of me that has trouble not trying for a baby ALL THE TIME by ANY MEANS NECESSARY.

But then I get really scared of Downs' or whatever other disasters could occur should I get pregnant.

I know that's a personal decision...but I just wondered what other people do.

It feels wrong somehow to make extra careful not to get pregnant. Aren't I trying to have a baby?

Am I wrong that the risk of downs is between 4-5% when you are 45?

Perhaps if I understood what the risks really are, I would be able to make a better decision. I have a hard time getting it--is 5% a terrible risk?

What other awful things will happen should I accidentally get pregnant with my own eggs?

I guess I'm asking whether it is irresponsible to have unprotected sex...as strange a question as that is. Am I doing something wrong?

Sorry for this idiotic question. My view is whatever happens, happens and the most likely thing is miscarriage.

I only ask because I am still a teeny tiny bit fertile still and I guess I tend to be pessimistic about everything.

I should also mention that I am bizarrely superstitious about all fertility-related decisions.

I know this is kind of a ridiculous question. I just realized part of my apprehension was something cruel my (much younger) brother said to me a few years ago about how it was 'wrong' for me to keep trying to get pregnant. I wonder if it was something my dad had said to him in private. I was looking forward to explaining to him how YOUNG the eggs were I used!

People say such mean things and I know if you got pregnant with Downs and kept the baby (I would not be able to do anything else, really I wouldn't) I fear the blame of others. But maybe those people are just jerks. I certainly think they are. Am I wrong?

What is the responsible, morally OK choice? Risk it or don't risk it?

I wish people were more understanding about the complexities of human life. They want everything to be 'clean.' They want everything to be controlled. Life is messy. Kids have handicaps. We aren't in control of everything that happens.


    
This message has been edited by arive on Apr 13, 2011 12:07 PM


 
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Responses

  1. Nothing wrong with continuously trying while waiting for DE (m/c ment) - Anonymous on Apr 13
    1. yes, that's right... - anon on Apr 13
      1. wow, I had never heard of Asherman's - Orchid on Apr 14
    2. thanks...most likely it would be a fizzled chemical - Orchid on Apr 14
     
  2. Reply... - Anonymous on Apr 13
    1. oh boy... - Orchid on Apr 14
     
  3. downs ment. - Dee on Apr 13
    1. I don't know what the real odds are (autism ment) - Orchid on Apr 14
     
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