As I thought about it more, I stopped feeling guilty. I don't think that women who get pregnant with their OE feel guilty for not adopting. So, why should I feel guilty because I decided to use DE instead of adopting? Maybe I am simplifying it too much, but that is what it really came down to for me. I would like to experience pregnancy. I would like my husband to have a genetic connection. I would like to carry the baby so I am not worrying about what the birth mother may be eating, drinking, taking while she is pregnant. I think these are all legitimate reasons for wanting to use DE over adoption. The more I thought about it, the more I thought I shouldn't feel guilty for having these feelings.