We too were told that success with DE was a given - I'd had children with my first husband years and years ago. My only problem was supposedly my OLD EGGS! We did three fresh donor cycles plus an FET after cycle #3 (transferred 2 grade 1 expanding/hatching blasts cycle 1, then three each of the same on the following transfers) and got nothing! Its heartbreaking when you think that DE is THE answer, only to find out you are still on the wrong side of the odds.
For our fourth fresh cycle we too changed everything we could change: tripled the daily steroid dose, took anti rejection injections (more steroids) the day before and day of transfer, and we too used DS even though there was no indication of anything wrong with DH. (S/As and DNA Frag all came back fine but we were having no success).
We finally had success with our fourth fresh cycle (fifth transfer) and have a 16 month old little boy. We'll never know if our success was due to something we did/didnt do - or if it was just finally our turn. When he was 8 months old, we went back to transfer our three frozens from the same cycle - and were only given a 20% chance of success - never thinking it would work - we were shocked to find out we were again pg - again with a singleton. Our little girl will be delivered via c-section on Thursday.
In all, we went through four different fresh donors and transferred a total of 17 embryos through 6 transfers to get our two little ones. Sometimes it takes awhile, no matter what the REs say - an 80% success rate still means 20% wont have a baby.
Its awful that with all the science, all the technology, it still comes down to crossing fingers, wishing on stars and butterflies flapping their wings at just the right moment after transfer.
" Some people built castles in the air. She constructed hers from mashed potatoes, which kept down demolition costs." Sarah Sloane, Borrowing Priviledges