a bit of a different take on this as I can address depression

We have had several conflicts and it really helps to see a good marriage counselor.
As for the profile? could be out dated, could be he is doing a mistake we all do sometimes, look OUTSIDE the relationship instead of within it.
Go with in.
As for DE I say go forward. Depending on where you are in process (if it's fresh and donor is on meds) by all means go ahead.

But also, open up and talk.

My husband suffers from Clinical depression, I have discussed it often on the Pink and we have had some frightening situations. Depression is NO JOKE as you know and a person will do just about anything to ease the pain, drugs, alcohol, sex, isolate etc.

This could be about depression more than anything else. It IS a disease and a fierce one. So if is not on meds and seeing a therapist (individually and with you) do so, it can help so much. It save my relationship.

I know a great Psychiatrist in New York area let me know if you need her. I have paged her when my precious DH could not stop crying. She has worked with him on medication and he feels like a different person! It's great. But it is an ongoing process.

xo
Birdy