I had no problems getting pg in my first marriage - this time around, it just would not happen. Went to DE,expecting it to work, after all, my body KNEW what to do - it was just my "old eggs"
Three fresh donor cycles - all with proven donors, all with excellent looking blasts got us nothing. Had all testing done - nothing found wrong. RE had no clue - could only shake his head. Did the FET from the third cycle - BFN again.
I was so ready to be done. I still have not recovered from coming to hate my body for all the "betrayals". DH wanted to try one more time, change everything and anything we could. I agreed for his sake, but emotionally I was so done.
Our last cycle - I did b/c instead of lupron. We again used a proven donor. We used DS as well - even though all DHs tests had come out great, and we always had beautiful blasts. I started prednisone when I started estrogen; taking 15mg a day instead of 5. Did PIO instead of oral progesterone. I had extra injections of steroids (anti rejection injections) the day before and day of transfer.
That fourth fresh donor cycle gave us our little boy who is now 20 months. We went back for the frozens from that cycle, never expecting it to work- just letting nature take care of those last three embies, and ended up with our little Annika who is now 4 months.
The docs have no idea WHY these last two cycles worked. We dont know what made the difference. Maybe it was the steroids, Maybe it was the DS. Maybe it was just our turn.
In all, it took us 6 transfers and 17 embryos to get our two miracles. Science sadly can only get us to transfer stage - after that, its back to wishing on stars, crossing of fingers and butterflies flapping their wings at just the right moment.
All this to say - I totally understand where you are, and how you are feeling. Talk to your RE see WHAT can be changed for next attempt. Find out if there is ANYTHING at all they can suggest, then offer your own suggestions from your research (mine was the extra prednisone and DS - the doc suggested the anti rejection injections).
I really wish you werent experiencing this, and pray that your next attempt will be the magical one.
" Some people built castles in the air. She constructed hers from mashed potatoes, which kept down demolition costs." Sarah Sloane, Borrowing Priviledges