I'm a bit younger, but my DH will soon be 50...March 29 2012 at 3:22 PM
|Kenny (Login Kenny2006)|
Response to confusing feelings
while we are contemplating one more child, and I just think.... it is what it is. We have only one fear, and that is that he won't be around as long as the kids need (and I) need him. But as he and I have discussed many times, he will be gone one day whether or not we have kids, and we can do several things to prepare ourselves and them -
1. stay in as good a shape as possible (as while many things are not preventable, many ARE through diet and exercise, meditation/ stress reduction, etc) - right now he's getting up almost every day at 5am to use the elliptical and meditate. I'm really proud of him! Now I need to get back on the wagon too and PUT THE BROWNIES DOWN...
2. have adequate life insurance to ensure the kids will reach adulthood with NO financial hardship, even if they have to sadly lose a parent (and talk to a financial planner about this, don't just guess - because you'll be surprised)
3. raise them from the beginning with confidence and self-reliance, our values, and as much common sense as we can possibly help them attain
3. form friendships/ relationships with other adults and make them a part of the kids' lives; DH and I are only children, so this will be important for us
Young parents sadly die all the time. As older parents, we may have a slightly greater likelihood of having to leave our kids before they're self-supporting adults, but truly, folks live so much longer now, that I'm not very worried. I mean, I could easily have cancer in five or ten years (KNOCK WOOD), but worrying about it now (other than taking the obvious preventative/ screening steps) will NOT help prevent it, right? Just cause a paralysis/ lack of enjoyment of the present.
So this is how we live with our "advanced age" (and man I hate that term LOL). I think you should GO FOR IT and have no regrets. Make the arrangements as you go, emotionally and pragmatically, to protect those future children, and then move forward without fear. And enjoy! Hugs,