Perhaps in the past when things didn't work we thought 'oh well thats life lets move on'. Only now you can only do that to a certain extent.
After a failed cycle you can say to yourself 'oh well thats life...' but instead of moving away from it all you move towards another cycle.
Bottom line is if you want a baby then that is how you must think and its what gets you through. Its just 'weird' that we don't give up when faced with so many failures. Certainly others cannot understand it and they make comments like 'oh isn't it time you gave up or make this your last attempt'.
We can't give up otherwise we will have major regret and no baby.
I always thought 'oh its not working. Why isn't it working? Something is not right. Lets find out what it is and sort it' and that is what I did. Sounds simple but no it wasn't. It was 8 failed cycles, one failed surrogacy, and six years to that elusive BFP.
Stay strong and keep going. You WILL get there, best wishes to you, THK