This post is awesomeI hope I can be a strong as you someday. I dont feel like a better person for my infertility, I hate the person I have become angry, bitter, and jealous it is awful. The IF road has beat me up and my relationship. Your post inspired me to try to look at things from a different view. I too feel anxious thinking about my age 42 and feel guilty. I tried for over 3 years and waiting because DH was not ready because he was newly divorced. I thought I was doing the right thing by waiting until his was ready so there was not resentment in the relationship.