I seem to have made a huge mess out of our attempts at donor ivf and could really use some advice. We have a medical FSA, and have been using it for our IVF attempts. We have an end of year grace period of about three months, so expenses are eligible up until March 15. We had a donor fall through in the fall so we had not spent all our funds for 2010, and had about $8000 left in March. So I made a payment to the clinic to use up the leftover funds. Little did I know how much of a mess this would cause.
Since we did not have an itemized receipt, they denied the claim, then they found other reasons to give us a hard time, a new letter of medical necessity with a doctor's signature, a denial for the sperm bank storage (claiming it's only for temporary storage, with the definition of temporary meaning it must be used within the plan year, when the expense was in November), requiring more specifics on the reasons why we are doing donor ivf, and on and on. They suspended our ability to use our benefits credit card, threatened to report the $8000 as income, all while we tried to satisfy their requests for documentation.
Trouble is, I don't have an itemized bill from the clinic, and the very strict finance person will not help us in anyway. We basically prepaid for future services, knowing we need to pay up front of our cycle as the clinic made clear, but not realizing the trouble it would cause. Then we realized they deducted the expense from this year's FSA, not 2010's! And they won't switch it until they get an itemized bill from the clinic.
So we are out the $8000 from 2010, we have had 2011's reduced by that amount, AND to top it all off, they are now using other claims towards that $8000, so the additional $2000 or so we have submitted (including the sperm storage they have now finally agreed to pay) against that claim, essentially reducing our bank balance by that amount! I was expecting reimbursement, now they say they won't, and we had to borrow money to pay current bills because we are $2000 short! It sounds incredible, but it's happening to us, and we are at a loss on what to do now. The FSA people aren't helping, my partner's human resources dept is trying to help, but we are dealing with an outside FSA coordinator company.
I talked to a friend, and decided we would rush getting things accomplished, and work to get some stuff done with that money, and submit that. But turns out, the clinic all of a sudden has a shortage of proven donors, and the two that are available aren't great (one had 6 good cycles, but the last was a huge failure, the second one cycle under her belt, seemed good but no pregnancy). So now I feel stuck once again. They have all sorts of new unproven donors, but that doesn't seem to be a good plan because we basically have the money for one good cycle, but only if we can get them to switch the money, which requires an itemized receipt!
We have been trying to have a second child now for 5 years, 9 tries of injectables for a second child, (it took 9 tries with #1 child), three miscarriages, and a long grieving process towards donor ivf.
Any advice? Please, I hope someone can help us fix this huge mess, an move towards our dream of providing a sibling for our son. Thank you.