HI all, thanks for your input. I've looked seriously at SA and have had email contact with Tertia but Maya is correct with the anonymity issue. We are actually looking at Kenya. They have a decent sized donor program with a 60% success rate and the cost is around the $5000 USD (that includes ALL meds even progesterone support if you are successful!). Their own donors are anon but we can advertise in country ourselves for a non-anon donor. A FET is only $300!!! (and I believe they are vitrifying).
Even though I am Caucasian I am happy to choose a dark-skinned donor as my DH is Kenyan and our OE son is quite dark. We also have tons of family in the area of the clinic so the trip will be a 'double hit' of fertility treatment and family get-together! Now obviously I have people 'on the ground' so to speak who could hand out flyers etc but we didn't want to tell family about DE until we tell any possible children. Thus that avenue is out! I hadn't considered a newspaper ad (see, told you I don't see 'outside' the box!!!) so I think that sounds a great idea.
THK, I am in QLD currently with very wet feet! Thankfully the rain has stopped now! Thanks for your suggestion, I have looked at that option, but with DH needing a visa for most countries and the family aspect, Kenya is an 'easier' fit. Although I must say I didn't realise that KL had Caucasian donors, so will keep that on the list as an option. We go to the USA regularly but can't afford the high cost of finding an agency donor willing to be known. Thanks also for your email addy. I've seen pics of your little guy and he sure is a cutie!