Emily, you are new to this board so give yourself a break and just let this faux pais go. You now know that you need to be sensitive while posting on this board and bracket any reference to your child, or anything that would be hurtful to another still on their journey...that's all.
There were many times that I too felt like leaving...ha...as recent as last week to be honest. (pink board) I'm glad that I have some great board buds who can be honest with me....and encourage me to stay as well.
Also, as we get to know each other the OT stuff of life (off topic) is important. Shortly after I came on this board and at the beginning of our DE journey, I found out that my mom was diagnosed with dementia. I had to grieve that I was loosing her, every time I visited her a piece was leaving me. She died last month. I'm so glad that I stayed on this board b/c there are others who are walking the same path with their parents...if we are able to experience the same thing in life and get it...well that is so wonderful but we can't all experience the same things. Hard times, no matter what they look like, make us kinder, more comapssionate is my belief. My mom had a tea cup that said, 'faith grows in the dark.'...I thought that was profound as her last years were very much in the dark...and fog.
I'm so sorry that you lost something that you were really counting on...so much of life really isn't in our control is it...the older I get the more I REALIZE that. We also can't control what others will think or feel as they get to know us. As we share our life, our dreams, our disappointments..someone will always have it worse off...or better too....it may trigger some intense feeling in another...but truly this is their stuff... it would be a sad statement if we felt that we couldn't share b/c of this fear...and so I encouage you to stay and let us get to know you...let us cheer you on during your journey to your soulbaby. Let's be very mindful of our dear sisters who are still walking a dark part of the path. We can be the shining light at the end of the tunnel.
Besides I've always wanted a friend from New Zealand.