Wow that is couple of very tough days. It is just so unfair sometimes. I have no advice except to not beat yourself up or feel guilty about how you are feeling. Your feeling are not good or bad, they are just what they are and they are normal given your situation. Two years ago when we were almost two years into our TTC journey without any success my BIL and SIL announced they were pregnant and very upset about it (both were forty and they had a 9 year old and a 7 year old). It was difficult but I just avoided them when possible because I couldn't take listening to them complain about being pregnant again. Now I have a one year old niece that I just love to death. You are very generous to be loaning your baby furniture to your friend. I hope sometime soon you will be asking for it back because you need it. Try to do something nice for yourself if you can (massage, pedicure or whatever makes you feel good.