So happy for you! Will you have a third or do you have two weeks of torture until ultrasound?
I can certainly relate to your feelings. I was struck early this am about how different my experience/reaction was this time compared to my bfp and great initial beta last spring. Last spring we were so excited and celebrated the accomplishments and enjoyed every moment until we got the bad news. Now it is more like we are waiting for the other shoe to drop. I think the only thing we can do is recognize it is out of our control and take one day at a time (easier said then done). This is a lesson I have only started to learn recently when my mother was diagnosed with stage three lung cancer and had an absolutely horrendous 17 day hospital experience. After this experience, I now know that I can handle anything that is thrown my way. I have God (or whatever spiritual force you believe in) there and helping me get through it. I had a surgeon tell me that my mother's cancer had metastasized which was completely unexpected based on pre-surgical imaging and work-up. My mother was in a really tough spot emotionally and not ready to handle that news at the time emotionally. I walked in her room two minutes after getting that awful news and my mother had no idea. This is an amazing accomplishment for me since my close family and friends knick named me "water works" because I cry so easily. But I realize now that I am stronger than I ever imagined. I really hope you will not have to face another loss but if you do I know you have the strength. And your board buddies will be here to help you through. ((HUGS)). I think if all goes well, I will have my first ultrasound the same day as you. My clinic does them at six weeks and eight weeks and since we will be six weeks on the 21st, I assume they will schedule mine for the 23rd as well.