But I want to share the very wise words one of the board ladies shared with me when I was in your shoes. She said, "I honestly don't believe you will ever second guess your choice because that would mean second guessing the child who is in your life." And she couldn't have been more right. I spent months agonizing over every aspect of the donor--appearance, academics, emotional similarities to me--and in the end, I'm not sure how much of it matters. I actually leaned toward picking a donor who looked like my husband (blond, blue eyed) instead of me (dark hair, brown eyes) because I thought it would be easier to hear the comments about how my daughter looks like him rather than people telling me how much she looks like me (and afraid I would just be thinking, no, she looks like the donor). But that's my personal take. I know everyone is different.
I guess I just really want to say that while this is such a hard and important decision, know that once you make it and move forward, you will feel nothing but thanks to whatever wonderful woman you chose to give you the gift of having a child. Good luck to you and hope to hear of your success soon!