UpdateNovember 28 2010 at 3:29 PM
|funintheskies (Login Funintheskies)|
Here's the update. I couldn't sleep last night, and I arrived at my clinic a full hour early. Luckily, the head embryologist was there, and she spent considerable time with me. The embryologist said she, too, was concerned about whether I should transfer two, given that I have a 3-year-old son and I'm now a single parent. Apparently, my case was a source of discussion among the embryologists.
As such, she answered many questions for me. In general, the clinic quotes frozen blasts results of 70 percent pregnancy rate with subsequent 30 percent multiple rate, both donor and non-donor. (They've actually had a noticeable uptick in identical twins in the last year, even resulting in one set of quads.) The clinic's FET results for 2010 involving donor and non-donor and blast and 3-day transfers were: 26 transfer, 12 pregnancies or 46 percent, and four sets of multiples or 15 percent of 26 and 33 percent of 12. She also said something strange about the frozen transfers resulting 27.9 percent multiple implantation.
As of this morning, I had in play: one blast, two early blasts, one cavitating morula and one 12-cell.
I asked the embryologist about her gut feeling on my situation. She expressed concern about the risks of twins but said her overall feeling was to go for two to transfer. She expressed a little concern about my age but more about just wanting me to be done with cycling. Her hope is that by transferring two, I'll get one and be done with cycles.
Shortly after, the embryologist looked up and gave me an update on my donor's most recent fresh cycle. The clinic retrieved 23 eggs but only fertilized 12 at the request of the recipient couple, leaving a cohort of eight embryos. On day five, the clinic transferred only one embryo, again at the request of the recipient couple for religious reasons. The embryo was not a blast, and the couple had nothing to freeze. The recipient ended up with pregnancy for a very short period, but it did not remain viable. The male was a youngish man as was the female.
Based on those results, the embryologist put my chance of twins at less than 20 percent. We also discussed options for refreezing embryos, but she said she has little data. The clinic has reported some successes with refreezes, but it does not use vitrification.
After considerable heartache, I transferred two: a blast and early blast. I wish I could say I left the clinic happy. I actually left conflicted and quite down. Part of it was that being there brought back so many happy memories of doing my last transfer with DH present and the joy of welcoming our son.
Also, my MIL sent me a long e-mail this morning with a long list of concerns about twins. What threw me off was that she had so changed her tune. I previously asked if her if she felt I should risk twins, and she said she would have gladly done so in my new circumstances and joyously welcomed twins. This afternoon, I told her that I would have proceeded very differently from the beginning if she had expressed such strong concern early on. This was a real change. Only my MIL plus one friend knows about the cycle, so I feel so on my own.
Along those lines, singleton or twins, I'm bracing myself for a backlash if I am successful. That, of course, would be tied to my new status as a single parent who recently lost her spouse.
Anyway, I transferred two with the hopes of getting one -- something the RE also encouraged. Under other circumstances, DH and I would have gladly pursued twins.
So, I'm left to see what the 2WW brings. Thanks in advance for any additional insights, especially on my donor's most recent fresh cycle and my clinic's stats.
P.S. Something I received in the mail on Saturday related to my new insurance benefits does suggest that I'll lose my IF benefits under the new policy in 2011.
Praying for your success (children ment)
|November 28 2010, 8:49 PM |
I really do know how hard it is with children on your own but the delight of having children as a daily reminder of DH is the best thing ever. I'm so blessed to have my twins as a reminder for their father who sadly passed away when I was 6 months pregnant. It is hard but well worth it and as they get older it does get easier. I am hoping for a healthy single one for you but do want you do know that anything in life is doable. Lots of hugs and lots of good vibes coming your way.
thinking of you
|November 28 2010, 11:59 PM |
This is such an intense experience. I am sorry people are not seeming understanding of your situation. But I think most people would think it is heroic and almost everyone will support you.
I don't know what you meant by backlash? A terrible problem in life is that people don't ever know what anyone else is facing and so some people can be judgmental. Is that what you mean?
Anyway ((((hugs)))). I'm sending you best wishes. Even under the best of circumstances, it's a roller coaster. I hope and pray this works out for you.
I join you in the 2ww. I am testing on Friday.
|November 29 2010, 8:07 AM |
Yahh! Congrats! I know you are really nervous, but don't be...it'll work out. I hope that the 2ww flies by and ends with fantastic results!
All my best to you!
Wishing you all the best!
|November 29 2010, 8:24 AM |
You are such a brave and strong person! I'm glad to hear the embryologists was willing to take the time to listen to your concerns and provide info. to help you with your decision. Best of luck with the two week wait.
I put back 2 perfect
|November 29 2010, 8:51 AM |
4aa blasts and now ten weeks with a singleton. Hope your cycle goes well - what a tough decision.
Best of luck
wanted to offer
|November 29 2010, 12:19 PM |
some comfort, cyber hugs and to say sorry about your DH.
I think you will be fine, singleton or twins. I would have done the same in your position. You will be fine.