I was on the over 40 board for a long time, got pregnant but lost the pregnancy at 11 weeks. Tried on our own for a long time as I didn't respond to further treatment and wasn't an IVF candidate due to my failure to respond to meds. It has taken me a long time to get over the loss of the twins and come to the point that I desperately still want to have a child and I'll never forgive myself for not seeking DE right away. We chose not to seek adoption as we've raised my husband's two wonderful children and I consider them my own. Adoption would not squelch that longing I have to be give birth to a child that is genetically related to my husband and other children, and to nourish that child from utero through life, so to speak. I thought the need might lessen over time, and I was having and still are having some health issues, but we're just wondering if the possibility is still there. We are so young at heart, both of us look and act 40, and we have such a wonderful family and life and so much to give still. I don't know how I'll feel when my children bring home their babies, and I don't want to be that jealous grandma. These things I can only say to you ladies and my husband. Hope to find some women in my same situation who can relate and possibly offer advice. I have given myself 9 months to lose 50 pounds and get into great shape then I'd like to proceed if there are any clinics who will take us at 50.
http://www.network54.com/Forum/288399/ Here is the link for our sisters who are over 50 and still having babies! The link is also at the top of the page when you arrived at this board. You are definitely NOT alone in your quest. So sorry to hear of your m/c, don't blame yourself for things that could have been, you are where you are now and you can make informed choices from here on in. Welcome and best of luck to you.
So happy to see you here Bethlyn!! How is A?? J just turned7 and I couldnt be happier (well, maybe if I had had 4 more!!) Hope life is treating you well. I guess I popped on here after years because I was wondering if 49 is too late for more????
wow, you are among the long ago but not forgotten group!
July 24 2012, 5:05 PM
I have so little time to post these days, but it's great to see and hear from a former cycle buddy, what a surprise I try to keep my posts to the pink board, but I do check in here to see if I can help somebody out. It's great to see your name 49 is NOT TOO LATE!
"Hope sees the invisible, feels the intangible and....m (child ment/pg ment)
July 23 2012, 12:04 AM
achieves the impossible." A dear friend of mine gave me this quote on a plaque while we were ttc using DE's.
It's not too late and if your heart is saying that you want to move forward this is a great place to come for inspiration and encouragement. As you see from the post above we do have an over 50 board and one of our dear board buds is newly pg...with her second and her first was born when she was 55 so you are 'young' on our board.
We completed our family using de's. I had our DS when I was 48 and our twin DD's when I was 51. My clinic on the west coast of Canada only works with women up to the age of 50...I cycled with the twins when I was still 50...but having said that there are lots of clinics all over the world that help women over 50 obtain their dream of becoming mothers.
I think that your goal to loose weight it a great, concrete place to start your process towards having your baby. Although I didn't have any issues with either of my pgcies, I think that had a lot to do with the fact that I was in excellent shape and very healthy. All through my mid to late 40's I worked dilegently with a naturopath and a TCM Dr. to stay in the best shape possible in order to conceive naturally so when we decided to move forward with DE's I was on top of the game.
I think our board bod Kacee may be helpful in inspiring you to loose weight which she did successful and she had her 3 babies in her late 40's and early 50's. You may want to search for her story on our over 50 board as I know she talked about her weight loss on several posts early 2011...maybe late 2010. She may even be lurking and give you some helpful hints.
As a former fitness instuctor I know there is no magic pill....move your body and start filling your body with nutritious foods are the keys...and lots of water to rid your body of toxins.
So while you are building a nice healthy room/womb/body for your baby to grow...do some research and find a clinic and then a donor who would be perfect for your family. And come and visit us on the over 50 pg and parenting board.
I wish you could have seen my DH (who is 53..and I'm 52 now) at the grocery store today with our twin babies in the front carrier of the shopping cart....we have all sorts of people stop and talk to us...many probably do a second take as although we are young looking...we still look over 40...but I see what I think is envy in lots of older women's eyes and I wish I could say to them...if you want this...you can do this too...but of course I don't...but when women like you come on and want to know if this is doable, possible..I say YES>>you can do this. Just start down the path and take the first steps on your journey...it's amazing how things just fly into place when we move in the direction of our dreams. All the best.
sorry, I actually had our first DE son when I was 49......I cycled when I was 48...and cycled with the twins when I was 50...had them at 51. Gee time flies hey and age, well it is just a number. That is a good belief to start putting into practise.
sorry but it's late here and I REALLY should have read what I posted before I hit send...but our dear board bud Kacee actually had 5 children. She lost weight before she had her last pgcy with her twin DD and DS, who sadly passed away after they were born early last fall. I believe Kacee was 53 or 54 when she had her last babies so she is such an inspiring board buds.
If you have any time search for her posts regarding weight loss. She is a poster on all three of our sister boards, this one, the yellow board, the pink board...pg and parenting using de's and our over 50 pg and parenting board.
Ok, I'd better close now and go to bed...I JUST wanted you to know you aren't alone.
it's not too late. I just lost our dear baby girl to Trisomy 21 4 weeks ago and I am sitting here very impatiently waiting for the chance to try again. I am 53 and DH is 41, very young at heart but have picked up a couple of pounds cycleing I would like to get rid of. I don't know what part of the country you live in but several clinics take older women. Cooper does (who I am cycleing with) CNY in New York, Shady Grove takes women up to 51. Get on the SART website, find a clinic you like and give them a call. Alot of them work with us "women of advanced maternal age"
I wouldn't give up on your dream yet. Fewer clinics do accept patients at 50+. GIVF accepts DE patients up to 55, but not in their vitrified egg program (and what is up with that? (:-/ ), and I believe CNY treats women into their 50's. I think both RBA and Shady Grove (?) cut off at 50 and 364 days. I think Cooper treats DE patients up to 55. Most clinics have another round of tests for 50+ patients, including EKG and colonoscopy. Losing weight will help you have good numbers on those tests and reduce the risk of complications in pregnancy, so good luck with that.
Thanks so much for your wonderful advice, information and support. I was kind of scared to log in today and get some bad news. I will keep in touch and check in from time to time. Send me your prayers and good thoughts to get my weight and blood pressure down. So glad to be back and have hope again.
We started on the journey when I was 45, and it took longer than expected, so after three failed DE cycles (2 fresh, 1 frozen), we had a winner with the third donor -- I was 51 when we cycled and got pregnant, 52 when I delivered.
Hi I'm awaiting my first DE cycle too. The waiting is sooo hard. I'm not 50 (45) but have also got a decent amount of weight to lose before cycling. Have you seen 'my fitness pal' website? It is a great place to be if you are looking to lose, lots of ladies our age on there. I'm having success with using the site.