I'm so glad you and your f-mom had a talk. It's good to get things out in the open. I don't think she was telling you that you had to mope around or whatever. I think, rather, that she was telling you that it's ok to feel whatever you feel, and to show what you feel. I suggest you keep the lines of communication open and let her know how you feel about her asking you all the questions she does (like "why aren't you sad?" and "tell me why you are sad"). She's really just trying to be helpful, but she needs your input on how to do that the best way for you. It's ok to be brave (and you really are very brave, even when you allow yourself to feel and to talk about feelings), but it's ok to feel too, and to express those feeling...and in case you didn't notice, I consider that to be a very brave thing to do. I know it will take time to heal, and time to trust, and all that stuff. But it really sounds like you are making progress, because you are talking about it.
If anything I've said confuses you, please ask me for clarification, cuz I will be happy to try to explain better. I'm glad you're here, Jamie-lee.