Hi Margaret,
Boy have I been there-I know how frustrating it is. When I was getting my memories-some were symbolic and some were real-but all in fragments which drove me nuts. Have you tried writing out what you remember? That used to help me connect to more. I hope you can validate what is coming to you-I used to go through so much denial-this couldn't be-I must be nuts-what's wrong with me etc. Even if it isn't all accurate there is a very good reason that what is coming to you is.
It may be paving the way for something else.
And there is a reason that you are remembering what you are now. Amazing the way our minds can protect us-only giving us a little at a time.
I am sorry that you were spanked-I was too-and I was told that I was bad-and it took me until recently to figure out that I was mostly being punished for what my father was doing to me. Pretty crazy ha? All I'm saying is that it doesn't necessarily mean that you did something to deserve it or that you did what you were told you did. I have faith that enough will come to you that you will know what the true story is.
Just remember that you were a child and no child deserves that-a child deserves to be allowed to be a child and the adult is the accountable responsible one. Take special care Margaret and I hope you feel free to share some of this-smetimes it can really help to just dump it all and know that no one thinks any of those things of you. Kimberly