I do remember you, and am very glad to see you here again. I know it is so hard when things come rushing at us like that. Is it possible to ask your alters to slow down a little bit in giving you everything? I know for some, it is not possible, but I figure it can't hurt to suggest it. Also, if you ever want to write about those memories or feelings, you are welcome to do so here, or in e-mail if that feels safer. In the meantime, remember to breathe, and try to be gentle with yourself and eliminate as much external stress as possible while you go through this terribly difficult time. You are not alone, and it will not last forever. You are healing, even though it does not feel like it. I hope that in time you will be able to get the happy feelings, because you truely deserve them, and they ARE there. Hang in there...you can get through this.