You've probably heard the phrase "sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me"
Well, guess what. names do hurt. They hurt a lot. The wounds ? they heal. The words? They're etched in my kids memories and dont go away. I'm sad for them today. They hurt more than I do, they're just allowing me to know now what they endured for me in the past.
Being told :
You're fat.
You're ugly
You're useless
I should have left you for dead
I should burry you in a field somewhere.
You're stupid
Cant you do anything right?
You're weak. Stop crying. Shut up. Go to bed and never wake up, ok?
You're revolting.
You're a pig. Your part pig/part cow.
You're nothing. A useless little nothing.
You will burn in hell for being so rotten.
If you would just behave, then maybe I would think about loving you.
You stink. You smell like evil. I can smell the evil coming out of your hair.
Dont even try to get clean, bitch child. You'll never be clean. You are a dirty, rotten filthy child.
I dont know if I am allowed to talk to someone from my system here, so if I am not, please feel free to remove this, Terrie.
N, I know you're going to read this no matter what I tell you, so please listen to me here.
You are not dirty, evil or bad. MandD told you lies. They are all lies. You are a beautiful little girl and you are not evil. THEY are evil people, N. I know that's hard to hear, huh kiddo. You dont have to protect them anymore. It's ok for me to say that because they are not going to hurt you or anyone else in here ever again. I'm sorry they told you all those lies. You didn't deserve it. I'm sorry I wasn't available to you in those dark times, N. I'm so sorry.
I love you,
Shellie