While I do not share your personal experience I have had some of my own and 1 thing I have learned is that in trying to help people will say the stupidest things. Sometimes they say nothing at all which is just as bad.
I believe life is a journey and why we are given certain obstacles on our path I will never understand. You look around and it seems that some have a very straightforward and easy path and some of us have great challenges and difficulties to overcome.
I do believe that we are loved and whether you believe in God or a greater power there are forces trying to guide and help us. I know at times it seems that things are so bad we just can't move on but those are the times I think we find we are so much stronger than we ever thought.
Believe me when I tell you there are people that love you and so many people that share your experience. You can find help and comfort in the strangest places. Maybe the warmth of a stranger, the touch of a friend or the love of a family member.
I will not tell you everything happens for a reason or God gives us no more then we can handle because personally I am tired of hearing it. I know people think they are helping with this but if they only knew.I will tell you that as you progress on your journey you will find great help and love if you are willing to accept it. It does not get better but it does get easier.
I know it seems sometimes like you have been building up all your life for 1 moment. I think you can understand this. For me life is all about lessons and learning and sometimes it is so hard. I have found the best thing for me personally is to try and help others. When I concentrate on this it helps me heal. I don't want to imply that this is the path for everyone as I know each must find their own way to healing.
I do want you to know there are many people that share your grief and sorrow. They will be out there just waiting to help you and may show up in the strangest places just when you need them.
I have found it very difficult to find the words for this email. What I really want you to take from this is that there are a great number of people who care about you. some you may not even know. They share your loss and feel your pain.
On this journey of life things are certainly not easy and it seems some have more to bear than others. I do believe you will find you are so very strong, more than you ever knew.
I know the feeling of 1 day being fine and the next of being overwhelmed with grief.I know you feel guilty at times for feeling good and enjoying yourself. I don't know how to fix this but I do understand.
I truly wish I had the words or power to heal your hurt. I can only listen whenever you need it and tell you that I do truly care. If ever you need to talk I am only an email or phone call away. Anytime I am here.
I hope that as you travel forward on your journey to healing you can find peace and comfort. Please know people do love you and they do care even it seems sometimes like you are so alone. There are people out there that know exactly how you feel and they share your pain. You are not alone.
If you ever need to talk I am here. I truly hope your journey of life takes you where you wish to be and that you find comfort for your pain.