Having read your tale of torture, I appreciate your feelings in regard to this particular evil. They do remain a threat, they do manage to pollute and corrupt the minds of more people. There are fights on this front, ugly ones, still ahead.
Their ideaology, however, has been wholly defeated. The corruption stranglehold they once had on our nation's institutions is gone. Not all of the corruption and influence is gone, but the stranglehold is. They simmer and burn in their hatred, but their power has been reduced to that of fringe reactionaries, and their threat that of individuals and small conspiracies pulling off crimes. They could bomb another Murrough building, or things on that scale, and cause a LOT of harm and grief, but they will never again rule this nation. Their day IS past.
I describe to you a world that prevails today, in which many of us live in real harmony and almost all of us in the USA at least are free from the institutional threats of oppression on the scale we once had. That represents SUCCESS but no, not to you, that's not good enough?
This is not to say we can ignore them, let our guard down against their evil message ONE bit, but it does mean we can put them into perspective.
All this time, when you say "the torch is sputtering", are you referring ONLY to the white superiority bunch? Sure they have adapted, with new double-speak, to try to look "good" or "good enough" but continue to preach the same hatred. Evil adapts, but it cannot hide its stripes from any who understand it.
You see the war as a soldier on the front lines, to stand in direct physical opposition to this band of the enemy. I see the war as much broader, this enemy as a mere minor player among a field of many players, and the DECISIVE victory to be won over them all as unattainable through the means you have used to bring us this far. It's for the minds and hearts of those vulnerable to their messages and lies that we must fight. Deprive them of new recruits and they will entirely from the earth one day, just as smallpox has been wholly eradicated as a disease under which we suffer. If you don't or can't understand, appreciate, or agree with that, so be it.
There is this horrible sense that I did not do enough.
That is all I am aiming at. It's the one, perhaps only, blight I see on all that you say you are about.
I demand and require perfection. And when that fails, I get irritable.
Perfection and excellence are as far apart as two polarities can get. One is the means for making progress, real progress, the other is the mechanism by which progress is destroyed.
Demanding and requiring perfection is NOT in any regard a loving position to take. It's a punishing position. It's a setup from the start.
You can also step out of it with a simple choice. I've laid that out for you already, so I won't repeat it. It is your choice to make. But let me make one more point, then I'll leave you alone.
You are breaking your promise.
Not in letter, perhaps, but in spirit you are breaking your promise. You sit and stay physically safe, but you fight on with the war in your heart and mind and soul, and there the engagements are JUST AS REAL in consequence to you.
"Don't trust, be perfect. Be perfect. Be perfect."
You don't trust us to keep the faith, to oppose the wrong and be effective in our opposition. You don't trust your own results. You don't trust humanity to preserve its own future. You don't trust your wife's love and some part of you resents her for restraining you. You don't trust your own judgement, even. You can't have trust and pursuit of perfection, they are mutually exclusive. If you have physically done all that you are able to do, what right do you have to sit there and stew and foam and fester in discontent? Strike one more blow at those who wronged you, forgive them for their weakness and patheticness, forgive yourself for all your moments of weakness, too, and find it in there somewhere, finally, to begin to trust. Trust not blindly, but be not blinded to trust. It is from lack of trust that the hatreds were born in the first place.