Someone kill Ben Friars!
9:05- Mike Stockwell 'equalises' for Colchester. Cue drunken cheers unbefitting of a cricket crowd
9:35- BBC Essex reports a 1-1 final scoreline and a standing ovation for the Colchester team.
11:30- Get home, cheerfully switch on the TV for a match report, discover that the bloody idiot can't distinguish between a centre kick and a free kick for offside...