I apologized for the length but it is so much to take in and so frustrating. My cousin, lets call her Nadia, came to drop something at my house and started talking to me, we have seeing each other frequently but have not had a girl talk, just the 2 of us for some time and I had not tell her anything about my dd case. Nadia seemed very depressed and I asked her what was wrong and even though I knew some of her minor problems, when she confided in me with this one, it brought tears to my eyes and I told her that I could sympathize better that anybody else with her situation since we have been going to something very similar. The story she told me made me so mad not only because if echo my daughter’s case in some ways but because the Social Worker acted so stupid on her case, (she leaves in a different county than mine).
She has a 13 years old son and a 4 years old daughter, during the summer her Mom came to stay with her and helped her with babysitting, but I think her mom is losing her marbles and the Social Worker took advantage of that. One of her son’s friend, also a13 years old boy, came home to play and for whatever reason when upstairs, pull the little angels underwear, touched her in her privates and put his “Black stick” (that is how the little angel called it), on her private, when she told him that it hurt, he left her alone and left the house. The little angel told Nadia while eating some cereal in the afternoon and her mom was cooking, what the boy had done. Nadia called a social worker and the SW asked her “Was there any adult in the house? Where was she when this happen? Why was the little girl alone in her bedroom? If you report it properly, your mom will be blame for leaving the little angel alone. It is the adults fault, basically.
When she asked her mom she said she must have gone to the bathroom when this happen and it probably did not take more than 5 minutes. Well because of the attitude the social worker took, Nadia decided to not press charges, but went to the boys house and talked to the parents, told the boy that after all this year of been treated as a member of her family, provided with breakfast, lunch and dinner, a place to stay when his parents are not home, etc.. He was not allowed to even walk in front of her house. The boy’s mom seems very receptive to the situation, but could not understand when it happened, “if he is not allowed to go to anyone’s house when the parents are not home”. Nadia told her well him and 4 other boys have been to my house everyday for the past 2 weeks and stayed for more than 2 hours playing with Wii. The mom was properly upset and I am sure she got to him later for breaking the rules besides the more serious charges.
The father on the other hand said he could not understand how the little girl, could make up a story like that, “after all she is only 4”, that something was fishy and that the little girl must have learn that from the house. Well after Nadia told them to respect her and her house, that she could have been knocking on their door with the Police and CPS on tow and that they should have been grateful that she had decided it to give the boy the benefit of the doubt and believe he was experimenting instead of just been a pervert, asked her little angel to tell the father what happen and little angel, not been shy at all (she has never been) told them exactly what she said to her mom, that shot him up nice and proper. They agreed to take the boy to a Counselor and for the boy to just stop any type of friendship with their son. Nadia says that the father called her the next day and came short of apologizing but pretty much told her that he believe it now, that they had made an appointment with a counselor and were going to take charge of the situation.
Nadia has decided that for now, she is going to leave it alone, I made her promise me to keep a good eye on little angel and that she starts acting up to please, please take her to a therapist, I tried to point out to her everything I have learn from you guys and that this type of things always come back to bit you in the behind, but she still thinks that little angel is fine and will not be needing therapy. I told her about our case and how much I have gather from these cases, but she wants to just leave it alone for now and see what happens. She did promise about therapy if her little girl starts acting up, and I will definitely keep an eye on the girl too. But all of this is so upsetting, what is wrong with this world, how come, more and more kids are having this type of behaviors?
Again I apologize for the length but it was so upsetting to hear what so many of you have said about the system being broken, how can CPS take this type of attitude to serious cases like this one and so many other cases, like some of yours? And blame it on the adults instead of the pervert. I give thanks to God that in our case things have work for the better and we will be closing the most painful part by the end of the week when sentncing happens but pray for Nadia, her family and all of the other families out there that are goig thru this type of injustice. Thank you reading and finishing this long story.
Bella
Posted on Sep 29, 2009, 10:36 AM from IP address 208.247.58.25
