HI- I haven't posted in a while but I wanted to share what has kept us strong and moving forward. Not quite 4 months ago our daughter disclosed to us that she had been sexually abused when she was 4 by her older brother who was 12 at the time. The damage to her was terrible- self harming for over 3 yrs,a PTSD diagnosis, depression, a suicide attempt and a 7 day mental hospital stay.
Kicking our son out of our lives was automatic-we were incredibly angry with him and our daughter needed to be away from him to begin to heal. If I had found out about this when it happened we would have reported him and got him help. I know in my heart I never would have let him near us again. These feelings about my son have not changed.
My daughter is healing. We have hope again. She has goals, has a date for prom and has plans for college in the fall. She goes to therapy once a week and still takes meds. She still fears a close relationships and has a very difficult time trusting anyone.
I am healing by going to therapy ( I only go once a month now), listening to a guided imagery Cd for PTSD, getting help with Radiant Recovery (a group that helps you heal sugar addiction for free using good food), posting here, taking vitamins, going to a women's group, screaming, crying, praying, talking to God and Jesus. Unfortunately I was unable to take meds because they made me too ill. I had one friend who has been supportive, the other 2 I told have just ignored it. (painful, but I have survived). No extended family knows. We chose only to tell them that our daughter was getting help for depression.
My two other daughters have had therapy and one is taking meds. They are both doing very well now. They have supported their little sister with a lot of love and understanding. They spent a week together over spring break. I am so grateful my younger daughter has them.
My husband doesn't talk about it but allows me to get upset about it when I need to. He is taking anti-anxiety meds and that has helped him keep it together. He goes to therapy with me sometimes. He has become our hero- protecting us and he is the only one who has talked to our son since our daughter disclosed. I know that although he doesn't show it -he is hurting.
Things are far from perfect. We do have a new normal now. We are not destroyed and we are survivors! Please, whatever your situation is -DON'T GIVE UP! It would be a tragedy if you allow the abuser to inflict anymore damage to you and your loved ones than they already have. AND YOU CAN HEAL FROM THIS! You are all in my thoughts and prayers. I would like to see more of you come back and tell us how you are doing. There are strength in numbers.
Posted on Apr 19, 2012, 1:34 PM from IP address 18.104.22.168