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  • how do i help her? DYFS vent
    • lost
      Posted Nov 27, 2011 12:17 AM

      my dd, now 3, was molested by her father the beginning of this year for about 4 months. 3 months into it, her father admitted, but then at his first therapy session, he retracted. DYFS was notified, came to our house to interview me and her father. He said that he only said that, and figured if he admitted and went to therapy it would "get me off his back" about it - as I had strong suspicions from the first day dd started acting funny (which was also not long after I started leaving him to watch her while I went out). At one point I took her to the ER when we were visiting family because she had pain in her v@gina and wouldn't pee. He showed up after a while, when he found out I had taken her to hospital to get checked out, and I mentioned to the workers there that I was uncomfortable with him there and how did he get in? They asked why, and I explained the story. They ended up trying to contact DYFS, and when we returned a few days later - DYFS told me that I was interfering and accused me of taking her for second and third opinions - I told them that they didn't even speak to her about anything. DYFS also did not allow me to take her for an eval., and that they were going to find someone to evaluate her. At the end of august, the case worker told me that she had found a place, because dd was so young, but her supervisor's supervisor vetoed it and they told me they were going to close the case because the therapists hadn't sent in any notes, and because the pedi didn't find any physical signs. They didn't close the case, as two months later they came to visit (this is for another post). Anyway, about two to three weeks ago, her father admitted again. DYFS has been notified of this but hasn't done anything yet about it. They were supposed to meet with me this week, but didn't show. I need to find a way to get her in with a good therapist who can do play/EMDR therapy with her. It wasn't consciously traumatizing to her, and, shortly after I was able to temporarily removed his access to her, she has since returned to her normal behavior. I just don't know the complete extent of what she was exposed to and am not an expert in this subject and just want the best for my daughter - that she should be healthy in mind and body. How can I deal with this?
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