To give more background, my son has not shown any regular behavioral issues up to this point. He's an amazing kid. Fun, creative, full of joy. So basically after the one conversation I had with my friend I learned that he had some very dark secrets. At first I thought he might just be exploring, but as more details came out (after a sequence of conversations over several days) it became clear that he must have been abused to have behaved in this way. I can't imagine that the other child would make things up but I have my son telling me with tears that he never forced the other boy to participate. He's heart broken and I am doing my best to reassure him that we love him no matter what. If anyone has any words of advice or of a similar experience where their child acted out sexually after being abused, please share.
At this point, I am feeling myself lose trust in those around me because I have no idea who could have done this to him. It's not possible for a little 5 year old boy to have picked up on this kind of behavior all by himself. We are afraid of talking too much more about it with him as we don't want to say the wrong thing and damage him further. He's really just a baby still and I feel so badly that this has happened to him and then happened to his friend. How do you ever trust people again, when anybody could have this kind of sickness in them and you wouldn't know it.