To my dear friend;
Please don't think I'm writing simply to try to sell you something, but starting to use the Kegelmaster can be an important step in getting your life back.
It will stop you from having to feel like you have to pee all of the time, it will halt the "falling bladder", and it will stop the cramping. Although it is not a priority now, using the Kegelmaster gives you some definite sexual advantages and confidence!
All of the symptoms you mention indicate your PC (pubococcygeus or "kegel") muscle is "crying out" for the Kegelmaster. Women should be very angry that their doctors don't stress how vital a healthy, toned PC muscle really is, and what the consequences of NOT rehabilitating the PC muscle after childbirth are for over 50% of the female population! You are SO not alone!
You didn't mention your diet, but if you are eating a lot of sugar, you've got to cut way back. Eat healthy as much as possible. Drink lots of water. It helps to eliminate caffeine and obviously you shouldn't smoke.
When you take antibiotics you also kill off the "good bacteria" that colonize in the stomach which help the body absorb the micronutrients that your body needs to keep your hormones in balance.
After being on antibiotics, I would suggest taking capsules containing "probiotics" that you get at a health food store.
Unless your doctor recommends against it, I think you should try to eat a diet which is high in "phytoestrogens" - this includes soy products - soy beans soy milk, tofu, miso, etc, and herbal supplements containing red clover or black cohosh.
After you've used the Kegelmaster long enough to get your fallen bladder (also referred to as "bladder prolapse" or "cystocele") under control you should try mild exercise, perhaps a little walking.
When you have used the Kegelmaster long enough to KNOW you have controlled the fallen bladder you should gradually introduce more vigorous exercise.
Be very careful about high impact exercise until you are quite sure that you no longer have the fallen bladder.
It is just my nature to give unsolicited advice, and you were so open and "giving" in your "Ouch" message so here goes.........
If you know that you can turn things around physically and emotionally and you really commit to a plan which would make it happen - maybe some professional counseling could save the marriage??? - unless of course he's just a jerk and you're better off without him!
The most important thing that you CAN do at this point is to take care of yourself!
Just realize the importance of EFFECTIVELY exercising your PC muscle. Your success with the Kegelmaster can be a natural "foundation" for other successes in your life!
You sound like a great mother and a wonderful person! I wish you the best!
With personal regards,