>
> Ah, Bancroft Tower on a bright and sunny morning in the
> summertime. The smell of the trees and the new-mown grass... the
> looming grey bulk of the monument...
[ALL hum the theme to "2001: A Space Odyssey."]
> the roar of the crowd.
> The crowd?
> Well, maybe not a crowd, really, but a pretty good-sized
> gathering, anyway. The local folks know that Gryphon fights, and a
> lot of them are his fans - whenever he fights here at the Tower, the
> WPI Science Fiction Society turns out en masse, even though some of
> them aren't really into violence, to cheer him on, and a lot of the
> local businesses send their support. After all, a World Warrior-level
> street fighter's reputation has a tendency to keep the streets quiet,
[There's a Dan joke in here, but...]
RACE: Unless it's Dan, in which case the streets are filled with howls of laughter.
[How's that? I wasn't sure if anyone in the theatre would take exception to japes at Dan; if they would, feel free to add their in-character objections. -z]
> and he and I -have- stopped a few local crimes just by happening to be
> in various local stores when some unfortunate idiot decided to shake
> the place down.
> I was also pleased to see that the WPI Campus Police had sent
> a representative, or perhaps she had taken it upon herself to come;
> either way, the presence of Sergeant Janet Marshall, in uniform,
ARL: Who in the name of Rokusaburo Michiba is Janet Marshall?
TBS: She's the chick in UF with the Photon weapons and the pet Mag.
GAVOK: No, that's Janice Barlow.
TBS: Oh. Then she's the transplanted Canadian living in London who looks like Daria and writes fics about Daria meeting her look-alike.
MMK: Nah, that's Janet Neilson.
> promised to keep the crowd under control. Not that Gryph has a
> problem with unruly fans most of the time, but you can never be too
> secure. Janet's a hell of a fighter in her own right. Once, I saw
> her break up a brawl in the Wedge with her bare hands, five big guys
> with knives and broken bottles and she didn't get a scratch.
ARL: Of course she used an M-16 to break it up, but never mind that.
> You might find the presence of local law enforcement, in
> uniform but not doing anything, at the site of an illegal street fight
> kind of odd, but it's that way in a lot of places. The cooler cops
> know that the real fighters, the ones who register with outfits like
> the WCMAT Authority, are trained and for the most part know what
> they're doing, and that they accept the risks inherent in the game.
> Nobody ever gets hurt in one of Gryphon's matches who isn't willing to
> get hurt, and, like I mentioned before, his rep keeps the local crime
> rate down. They know he's a straight arrow, and so they look the
> other way, and sometimes, like Janet, they turn up to provide a little
> crowd control and give the proceedings an air of legitimacy.
> Besides, I think Janet's kind of sweet on Ben, though she'd
> probably hurt me if I mentioned it.
[]
> If I were him I don't think
> it'd hurt my feelings if she were; Janet's not exactly what I'd call
> hard on the eyes.
> Gryphon's "arena" isn't fancy; it's just the square of
> more-or-less-flat asphalt in front of Bancroft Tower's walkway, from
> the two mini-turrets (and the line of Jersey barricades between them)
> to the wall that keeps people from driving off the hill, bordered on
> the sides by the turrets themselves. Gryphon stood by one turret, Ryu
> the other; Gryphon was wearing a black-and-white NIN shirt, his old
> jeans, his gloves and his Batman cap,
TBS: Now, does that amplify the coolness effect of the NIN shirt, or cancel it out?
ARL: Or does it rather amplify the poserness?
> while Ryu had his usual white
> gi, headband and vambraces.
> Janet separated herself from the spectators, then, and went to
> the middle of the ring, and I realized that she was going to ref for
> Ben, something she does occasionally for his home fights, though not
> always. Whenever she does, it's an extra incentive for his opponent
> to stay in line, not that she had anything to worry about with Ryu.
> I felt a hand on my arm; turning, I was surprised (and
> pleased) to see Meg grinning at me.
> "Meg!" I declared. "How'd you get here?"
> She shrugged. "Hitched."
> "That's dangerous," I pointed out, trying (and failing) to be
> stern.
> She rolled her eyes adorably.
TBS: Then she scratched her butt adorably, took a bite out of her greasy Taquito adorably, then belched.
S.D.: Adorably, I take it.
TBS: Heck no. Who ever heard of belching adorably?
S.D.: ...
RACE <Meg>: Itsy-bitsy cutey-wutey Meggy-chan is sooo kawaii! WAIIII!!!
ARL: Race?
RACE: Yes?
ARL: DON'T DO THAT.
> "I think I can take care of
> myself. Anyway, I wanted to see the fight, but I figured you'd be a
> little busy to come and pick me up."
> "Well, you're just in time," I said, "I think it's about to
> start."
> Just as I said it, Janet cleared her throat and announced the
> fight.
> "Ladies and gentlemen!" she declared in the clear, loud voice
> they teach at cop school for crowd control. "May I introduce today's
> challenger! A Shotokan Karate fighter from Tokyo, Japan, with a
> hundred and eight wins - ninety-nine by knockout - three losses and
> two draws: Ryu Hoshi!"
> As Ryu stepped out to the middle of the ring, on Janet's left,
> most of the crowd, knowing Gryphon's fondness for politeness,
> applauded. A couple of high-school kids toward the back booed and
> yelled "YOU SUCK!",
GAVOK <Ryu>: I don't suck; I'm just in a different quality bracket!
> and I could see Gryphon making a mental note to
> speak to them later. Alone among the spectators, Sakura cheered
> wildly.
> "And Bancroft Tower's champion, an Icon of Stone Ler Drit
> fighter with sixty-seven wins - fifty-four by knockout - two losses
> and no draws: Ben 'Gryphon' Hutchins!"
> Now the crowd cheered as Gryph took his place on Janet's
> right, save those two jerks in the back, who still booed, and Sakura,
> who was entirely silent.
> "OK, you guys, here are the rules. No choke holds. No
> intentional dislocations or broken bones. If the other guy quits, you
> stop. Got it?"
ARL: Nothing about foreign objects?
GAVOK: All RIGHT!! Hardcore rules Street Fighter!
> They nodded.
> "Shake hands," Janet said; Gryphon and Ryu shook, then backed
> up a couple of steps and bowed.
> "Ready?" asked Janet. Gryphon nodded. She looked to Ryu; he
> tightened his headband, then nodded as well. "Fight!" said Janet, and
> she backed up behind the Jersey barricades.
RACE <Karate Judge>: Begin!
> Ryu didn't waste any time; as soon as Janet was out of the
> way, he leaped up and forward as if going for a drop kick, but landed
> short, trying for a leg sweep. He caught Gryph flat-footed (pardon
> the expression) with that one, tripping him up; Gryph had been fading
> back and preparing a punch counter for the kick, and fell heavily to
> his back on the pavement, but almost immediately rolled to his feet
> and launched a spinning back fist. Ryu stepped smoothly into the path
> and blocked the fist with his left forearm, launching a jab with his
> right; Gryph ducked under it and shot an off-hand ducking fierce into
> Ryu's gut.
> He should've flared it, I thought to myself as Ryu was shoved
> back a little by the force of the blow. Then I realized why Gryph
> hadn't done just that - he was already channeling his Ler, using it
> for the push-off in the second part of his ducking-fierce-to-knee-thrust
> combo. With his Ler pushing him, he exploded up from the crouch,
S.D.: Who's the wise guy that planted the land mines?
RACE: Okay, why did I just read that as "exploded up from the crotch?"
MMK: "Ben Hutchins remote detonated my balls?"
> left
> knee outstretched, and the knee plowed up under Ryu's chin, knocking
> him over backward. As Gryph landed, feet spread, Ryu got unsteadily
> to his feet and wobbled for a moment.
> Capitalizing on his window of opportunity, Gryph swung into
> his double high kick; the first blow caught Ryu full in the face, but
> seemed to wake him up.
TBS: A cup of coffee would have done the same thing.
> The Shotokan fighter ducked the second kick
> and, while Gryph was still winding out of his spin, Ryu cocked his
> hands at his side, eyebrows colliding.
MMK <singing>: ...and this is what it's like when eyebrows COLLIDE!!
Are you ready to go? Yes I'm ready to go, what'cha wanna do, bay-bay,
bay-bay...
> I winced, knowing what was
> next:
> "HADOKEN!" The fireball crashed into Gryphon's midsection
> from point-blank range, drawing an audible grunt as the air was forced
> out of his lungs, and as Gryph stumbled back, Ryu kept his crouch and
> wound into a stance I knew, from watching previous fights, meant
> trouble.
> "SHORYUKEN!" Ryu cried, launching himself up in one of the
> other signature moves of his style.
TBS: Often imitated... and often duplicated, actually.
ARL: Right now all the shoto-scrubs are salivating at the thought of
being able to combo a Hadoken into a Shoryuken.
RACE: Just salivating?
ARL: Well, possibly other things, but I'd like to keep this conversation
at a PG level, thank you.
> It was a textbook blow, caught
> Gryph right under the chin, picked up him and dumped him on the
> ground, and I could have sworn I saw his eyes turn into little X's at
> the moment of impact. Gryphon didn't bounce to his feet with quite
> the same speed as he had last time, but get up he did, with that gleam
> in his eyes that showed he was really enjoying the fight, and his
> hands flared and crackling with energy.
> Again Ryu wasted no time, launching himself into a Hurricane
> Kick (with appropriate shout), but this time, Gryph was ready for
> him, his flared arms raised and crossed in a block. Ryu's kick shoved
> him back a little, but as Ryu was busy landing, Gryph moved with all
> the deceptive speed his opponents rarely give him credit for, darting
> his left hand forward, seizing Ryu's head face-on,
MMK <singing>: I will make you smell the glove...
[A faraway "Ding!" echoes in the theater.]
> and, forearm
> muscles bulging, lifted him clean off the ground. Ryu raised his
> hands to Gryph's wrist, but he was already completing the throw,
> slamming Ryu down on the ground as if he were spiking a football after
> a touchdown.
GAVOK: It's the Wyler Throw! Yeah!
RACE: "Wyler Throw?" Who the hell is Wyler?
[Long pause.]
GAVOK: You want to know who Wyler is?
RACE: Well, yeah.
GAVOK <agitated>: *You* want to know who *Wyler* is?!
RACE: Um... yes...
GAVOK: YOU WANT TO *KNOW* WHO WYLER *IS?!?*
RACE: Well, if you're going to-
GAVOK: WYLER IS YOUR *GOD*, FOOL!!!
[The entire theater begins to shake. Suddenly, part of the left wall
explodes outwards in a shower of bricks, and WYLER, an eight-foot tall
overmuscled behemoth of a man in torn pants, lumbers through.]
WYLER: Who say they not know Wyler??
[ALL BUT RACE leap out of their seats and scatter. WYLER lumbers over to
a terrified RACE and glares at him.]
WYLER: You not know Wyler? Then you PAY!
[WYLER reaches out with and picks up RACE by the head. He rears back and
prepares his Wyler Throw (tm) when a woman wearing a black jacket and wielding a whip runs through the hole in the wall.]
WOMAN <shouting behind her>: Hey Proto, he's here!
WYLER: Crap.
[WYLER drops RACE and runs through the opposite wall, scattering bricks
hither and yon. The WOMAN chases after him, followed by a man who looks
exactly like Genjuro from "Samurai Shodown."]
MAN: Yo Edgey, don't lose him! <to himself> Damn it, Gunsmith ain't payin'
me enough for this...
[They both disappear through the hole in the wall. Silence reigns for a
few moments, and ALL slowly return to their seats.]
ARL: That was... even more random than usual.
S.D.: No kidding.
GAVOK: Now you know the true power of Wyler, Racewing.
RACE: ...I hate this theater.
[...oy. Sorry again. -RoP]
> Ryu rolled a couple of feet away and got back to his feet,
> settling into his ready stance, looking battered,
GAVOK: Kentucky Fried Shotokan!
> but not bowed. He
> nodded, ever so slightly, with respect, and waited for Gryph to make
> the next move.
> Gryphon did not disappoint; reflaring his hands, he swept them
> forward in a crackling arc and unleashed his Psycho Lightning.
> Unfortunately, the sweep gave Ryu enough warning; he jumped over it,
> knocking Gryph back with a flying kick and landing in front of him in
> good position for another Dragon Punch.
ARL: As for the people standing behind Ryu... well...
> Gryph grinned, just a little, and his eyes gleamed.
MMK <Gryphon>: Aku wa yurusen!
> Then he swung into his most complicated combo, the one I'd
> seen him pull off a grand total of three times so far in his career:
> a fast and vicious three-puncher, left jab, right cross, left
> uppercut, that drove Ryu back enough for Gryph to go into a seamless
> double kick.
MMK <Strider> and GAVOK <Wolverine>: Amateur.
[I'd have Wandy say something, but then I'd be jumped by Shade yelling "MADS DON'T RIFF!! MADS DON'T RIFF!! BLAAAARGH!!" -RoP]
> By the first kick's impact, Ryu was already unconscious;
> the second kick juggled him back into a semblance of a standing
> position, and then he toppled over backward and sprawled on the
> pavement. There was one move left in the combo, but Gryphon saw there
> was no need for it and arrested his motion before he could follow his
> falling opponent down on one knee and bounce his head off the asphalt
> with another left jab.
> The crowd went nuts as Janet shouted "Champion wins!"
[ALL watch the screen in stunned silence.]
ARL: I'm sorry, but I did NOT just see Gryphon beat Ryu Hoshi...
RACE: Yes you did.
ARL: You're not helping!
GAVOK: I'm gonna say it.
S.D.: You're not gonna say it.
GAVOK: I'm gonna say it!
S.D.: You're not gonna say it!
GAVOK: Fine, I won't. But Snotters and Knight will.
TBS, MMK: Who *booked* this crap?
>
> G
> Ryu was already sitting up and holding his head by the time
> Janet and I reached him; I offered him a hand up, which he accepted,
> and as I drew him to his feet, he clapped his other hand to my
> shoulder and grinned.
> "You're better than you were last time," he said.
> "I beat you last time, too," I pointed out.
ARL: I'm sorry, is this some other version of Ryu that we don't know about?
Some version that didn't beat M. Bison, Akuma, Gill and goodness knows how
many other people?
RACE: Woah! Hold the phone, I just thought of something! Y'know how Ryu's
supposed to be the greatest fighter ever, right?
ARL: Right...
RACE: ...and Akuma's looking for great warriors to fight against, right?
ARL: Right...
RACE: ...and anyone who managed to defeat Ryu, not once but TWICE has to be
a great fighter, right?
ARL: I suppose so, but what are you-
[A beat. ARL smirks.]
ARL: Hutchins just stepped in it big-time, didn't he?
RACE: Oh yeah.
> Ryu shrugged. "What is it the fans of the local baseball
> team say? There's always next year."
> As Janet got out a penlight and checked both our eyes to make
> sure we weren't walking around with any lethal brain hemorrhages
> going, we noticed we were no longer alone in the ring; a small figure
> in a sailor outfit had broken away from the crowd and was edging
> toward us, hesitant, with a mixture of concern and appalled shock on
> her face.
> As Ryu turned to face her, Sakura looked up at him and said
> incredulously, "You... you -lost-."
GAVOK <Sakura>: You SUCK! That's it, I'm obsessing over Terry Bogard
from now on!
> She looked somewhere between
> astounded and crushed, as if she'd just seen a street gang mug Santa
> Claus.
> "It happens," Ryu replied, nodding. "Not often, but it
> happens."
> "But - "
> Ken prevented us from ever finding out exactly what her
> protest would have entailed. He hadn't forgotten his promise to take
> on the winner, and now, even if the winner hadn't turned out to be the
> one he thought it would be, his fighter's ego wouldn't let him back
> down.
> I won't bore you with the details of our fight. Did I win?
ARL <Gryphon>: Did I ever!
RACE: Bitter?
ARL: Yes.
> Hah! The day I can defeat Ryu AND Ken in succession is the day I go
> to M. Bison's island fortress and rifle his sock drawer.
MMK: So he hasn't booked himself as *completely* indestructible.
ARL: Or else he simply realizes that there's a difference between suspension of disbelief and expecting your readership to *hang* their disbelief by the neck 'til dead.
> When I came to, I thought that somebody, maybe Janet, maybe
> Cammy, was mopping at my face with a wet cloth. Then, after a few
> moments of gathering my brains back together, I realized it was
> actually Fury, and, lacking thumbs, he wasn't using a cloth.
> "Eyagh," I remarked, pushing him away and sitting slowly and
> carefully up. Nothing rattled around too badly, so I tried standing.
> I must confess I accidentally copped a bit of a feel when Janet rushed
> to prop me up with her shoulder, but it wasn't intentional,
RACE: Right.
> I wasn't
> in a position to enjoy it much,
RACE: Riiiiight.
> and she didn't seem to notice.
S.D. <Janet>: Do that again and I Rodney King your ass.
> Focusing my eyes on the quintet before me, I saw that Ryu,
> Sakura, Cammy and Zoner looked worried, while Ken looked contrite.
> "Well," I grumbled, testing my arm and leg joints to make sure
> everything still bent in the right direction and -only- the right
> direction, "I hope you're satisfied, Ken."
> "Woof," said Fury reproachfully. I scratched his ears.
> Ken hung his head. "I guess I'm kind of a jerk, huh."
> "I guess," I said as severely as I could, but when he peeked
> out at me through his bushy reddish eyebrows, my severity cracked and
> I snickered. "But aren't we all, at times?
TBS <Gryphon>: Well, besides me of course.
> Tell you what, I'll
> forgive you if you'll forgive Ryu."
> Ken looked dubious for a moment, then smiled and turned to
> Ryu. "OK... put 'er there, pal."
> Ryu smiled and took his old friend's hand.
> "All right. Now I'm gonna get some Tylenol in this head of
> mine, and we're gonna go celebrate. Who's with me?"
>
> The staff at Ping's Garden have learned to roll with it when I
> turn up on their doorstep with a small horde of hungry people. And a
> horde we were, rampaging and ravenous: me, Ryu, and Ken, showered,
> changed and starting to show some bruises; Janet, now off-duty and out
> of uniform in t-shirt and jeans; Charlie; Rose; Sakura; Cammy; Zoner,
> happy as could be since he'd been smart enough not to bet on my
> second fight, or maybe just because Meg Bennett had turned up; and
> Meg, sprightly as always.
> Again, I think I'll just leave the details to your
> imagination.
ARL: I don't know, Ben...
[ARL looks at S.D. and RACE.]
ARL: Do you really think that's wise?
RACE: That's a shallow stereotype and you know it.
> We ordered a ton of stuff, passed it around, swapped
> entrees, cadged each other's appetizers, and gorged ourselves silly.
> We told embarrassing stories about each other, asked personal
> questions, renewed old friendships and began a few new ones. When the
> meal was done, Rose had to get back to Maine, Charlie to wherever he'd
> come from (he didn't mention it and we didn't ask),
MMK: He said it was too complicated to explain.
[ARL twitches.]
> Meg to Boston and
> Cammy to Scotland; the rest of us, after goodbyes and promises to keep
> in touch and a fresh exchange of phone numbers and email addresses,
> adjourned to Playoff Entertainment (the infamous "Ten-Minute Walk")
SD: Infamous? From what exactly?
MMK: The first UF.
SD: Oh. I missed that.
ARL: [still twitching] Lucky you.
> for a raucous evening of video gaming.
> Here, we six, as a group, learned many interesting things
> about each other.
> - I would rather play S.T.U.N. Runner than anything else in
> the joint.
> - Zoner is a big fan of Hard Drivin'.
> - Janet kicks -ass- at Lethal Enforcers. (What a surprise,
> huh?)
TBS: Yeah, her and Lynn Cullen.
> - Sakura is hell on little red sneakers at air hockey.
> - Ken is not very good at Karate Master.
> - Ryu is the galaxy's most inept driver.
> We had a hell of a good time, though. Playoff had a new game,
> the second in Sega's Virtua Fighter series - a unique series, not only
> for its rendered-polygon technology, but also for the fact that the
> characters in the game are based on real fighters, some of whom we
> knew.
ARL: I'd pay good money to see what some characters would say about the games they're in...
RACE: Or what the programmers would say to the characters... <programmer> Well Miss Kasumi, we didn't have much to go on when it came to animating your breasts, but we could try some motion capture technology. Here, let me attach the sensors...
[Rephrase?]
[Nah, it works for me. -z]
> We all had a good laugh at the thought of the real Jacky
> Bryant's hair being all polygonal and spikey like that.
> "Huh," said Ken, watching Ryu and Zoner go at it on VF2.
> "Y'know, we should get together and with some game company and do
> something like this." He grinned.
ARL: ...and the Fourth Wall simultaneously implodes *and* explodes.
TBS: What kind of sound would that make, anyway?
> "Oh great," Janet observed. "Next thing you know every
> league's got its own game. What's that second-string circuit where
> they allow body armor and blunt weapons?"
> Sakura snorted. "The Vipers? Nobody'd touch a game with
> -those- sleazebags in it."
RACE: You know, I'd say something about Hutchins flaunting his opinions,
but he *does* have a point.
> "I suppose not," Ken said, warming to his idea, "but we've got
> charm and class! Only wouldn't it be cool if, instead of this 3D
> polygon stuff, it was a hand-drawn anime-style game, y'know, with 2D
> animated sprites, like a modern version of Karate Master? Yeah,
> that'd kick! I'll have to make some calls."
ARL: Spot the irony, ladies and gentlemen!
GAVOK: I found it!
[A beat.]
GAVOK: Wait, it's just a dried-up Jujubee. Sorry, my bad.
> "I'd pay real money to see you get M. Bison to agree to be in
> a video game," I remarked.
> "Watch me," Ken said with a smirk. "He'll do it; it'll feed
> his ego."
> "Why hand-drawn?" Janet wondered.
> Ken shrugged. "Looks cool. Cooler than polygons, anyway.
S.D.: Uh-oh, Cracker Jack and Sharon aren't going to like *that*...
> If
> you get the right artists."
> "If you're going to make it sprite-based," Ryu wondered,
> pausing for a moment to take Zoner for a ride on Splash Mountain, "why
> not use digitized photos of the fighters?"
> Ken, Sakura, Zoner, Janet and I all winced together and said
> in unison, "Eew!"
> "OK, maybe not," Ryu said, shrugging and returning his full
> concentration to the game.
>
> END BATTLE 03
>
>
>