> The next day, after transporting from Switzerland, Chris arrived in
>front of the Tung So Karate Super Center.
>
> "Private eye Chris eh?" asked Zborfsky. "You can't get any more
>ridiculous than with this disguise."
MARK: You can try wearing a bag over your head with one eyehole cut out.
GAVOK: It works particularly well for doctors.
> "Quiet Zborfsky, we're not here on a pleasure trip, you know," said
>Chris a bit annoyed.
TBS <Zborfsky>: Well, maybe *you*'re not.
>"I didn't want to come here. Master Sema's
>students are hated here, you know."
VID <Chris>: Unless it's just me they hate, but what are the odds of that?
> "Ah, Chris, Master So will still talk to you," said Zborfsky. "Just
>watch out for the manly attitudes from some of the other instructors."
>
> "You're right, Zborfsky," said Chris, as they approached the Tung So
>Karate Super Center.
TBS: Zborfsky is *always* right!
>
>
> "We'd like to speak to Master Tung So please," said Chris to the
>receptionist.
>
> "Master So will not speak to a member of Master Sema's school," said
>the receptionist. "I'd advise you leave immediately."
TBS <Chris>: Ah well. Guess we'll just cancel the adventure and go home.
MARK <Zborfsky>: Good thing too. I'm not sure if I locked the door or not.
> "Tell him Chris is here, to speak about Dann Zenretsu," said Chris.
>"I'm not here on a pleasure trip."
MMK <Zborfsky>: Yeah, you just *said* that like thirty *seconds* ago--
TIFF <Chris>: Quiet!
> The intercom rang, "Renee, send him back. It's OK," said a voice.
[A pause.]
VID <Master So>: Wait... I was supposed to wait for you to call me on the intercom before I spoke, right?
MARK <receptionist>: *Sigh* We've been through this scene for ten times now!
VID <Master So>: Right, right... I'll get it this time.
> "I don't know why he wishes to speak with you, but the master said
>it's OK. You can go on back."
>
> Master So came forward to the desk, "Hello, I'm Master So," he said
>bowing in courtesy to Chris. "What may I do for you today?"
>
> "I'm here to talk about some things, do you have the time?" asked
>Chris.
GAVOK <Master So>: It's dodgeball time! Bitch.
> "Most certainly," said Master So. "Come on back."
VID <So>: In about half an hour or so.
>
>
>
[MARK glances at his watch.]
> "So, how may I help you Chris?" asked Master So.
>
> "What happened between you and Master Sema?" asked Chris. "What's the
>cause of the whole rivalry?"
MMK <So>: Okay, story time.
[TIFF cringes.]
> "Many years ago, Master Sema and I trained together. We both had the
>same ideas:
GAVOK <Master So>: Delicious sandwiches at low, low prices.
> Opening up our karate schools, running them as a business,
>helping the community; however, Master Sema always had that
>righteousness about him.
VID: Not to say "stuck-up".
MARK <So>: I see he's been passing it down to his students.
>Anytime it came to defending people, he'd
>always do it no matter the cause."
>
> "Then why did you split?" asked Chris.
TIFF <Master So>: The floor is slippery and I am very flexible.
> "He was my second man in charge at one time, and he cost me a lot of
>money when he defended one student.
TBS <So>: I paid *good money* to have that kid whacked, but *noooo*!
>I couldn't afford him, so I told
>him he had to hit the road. He did do very well on his own, and I
>respect him for it."
>
> "He never gave up, did he?" asked Chris.
>
> "But I could never understand why he defended his students so much,"
>said Master So. "It's not worth the trouble, and he ended up getting a
>Raging Demon in return for it eventually."
MMK <Master So>: He keeps it in his closet.
> "Because he loved them," said Chris.
MARK <Chris>: Raging Demons, that is. I never really understood that about him.
> "I love my students also, but I can't interfere with them," said
>Master So.
>
> "OK, what about Dann Zenretsu, what's his story?" asked Chris.
TIFF <So>: I dropped him on his head.
VID <Chris>: Oh.
TIFF <So>: Here, let me show you.
VID <Chris>: No, that's fine.
> "Dann Zenretsu, a fine, young talented Black Belt. He once had some
>trouble, until some guy from Sema's school trained him well. After
>that, I offered the guy a lot of money to stay on, but we broke up
>because
TBS <Master So>: ...we didn't love each other any more.
>I couldn't afford him in the long run."
MARK <Master So>: I never should have agreed to payment in gold-pressed latinum.
> "Is money all you care about, Master So?" asked Chris. "You're a
>disgrace to the karate industry."
TIFF: The fact that there *is* a "karate industry" is disgrace enough, I should think.
MARK <Chris>: This is quite *clearly* a McDojo.
GAVOK <So>: I see Master Sema never got around to teaching you *tact*.
> "Not always. I took care of Dann after the Sema student left, but he
>turned on me for an evil deal with Necrosaro. I had offered him the
>lead of the demo team, but he turned it down."
>
> "Why does it say a higher power persuaded Dann?" asked Chris.
MMK <Master So>: Who says?
GAVOK <Chris>: It!
MMK <Master So>: You believe a guy who doesn't know the meaning of the word "haircut?"
> "I have no clue," said Master So. "All I know is of Necrosaro's
>intervention."
MARK <Necrosaro>: Dude, you've been drinking way too much lately and we, your friends, are sick of it.
> "Ah well," said Chris. "I guess I won't get any more there."
>
> "Your skills are very highly tuned, Chris," said Master So.
VID <So>: Now I need to tune. Give me an E.
[MMK hums an E.]
VID <So>: Thanks.
>"You wouldn't have been able to win the Street Fighter vs. Mortal Kombat
>tournament without them.
MMK: Yes, that is kind of how fighting tournaments work.
> However, I stand by my position.
GAVOK <So>: In the place where I live.
VID <Chris>: Now face north.
>I do not know anything more than Dann Zenretsu went to the dark side and he was
>trained by a former Sema student."
TBS <So>: And his name looks funny.
> "Well, it was nice talking to you," said Chris. "At least I got some
>information."
>
> "It was my pleasure," said Master So as he extended his hand to Chris
>and Zborfsky. "If you ever want to train here, it's on me you know."
TBS: YES! Make Zborfsky the deadliest force known to man!
> "No thanks," said Chris. "I'll pass on that."
>
>
>
MARK: Go ahead, we can wait.
> "Well, what now?" asked Zborfsky.
>
> "Tell your mom thanks for the ride," said Chris,
TBS: Is that what they're calling it nowadays?
VID: Snot...
TBS: It's right there in the fic! You saw!
> "but I've got to
>transport back to the base.
>
> "Chris, just wondering, have you ever heard of the Demon and Demoness
>Zenretsu?"
>
> "What's that?" asked Chris.
> "Oh, just a legend," said Zborfsky. "I don't believe it for a
>minute."
[MMK produces a giant bristol board from under his seat. TBS pulls a wooden stand off the wall and sets it up next to the screen.]
> "C'mon, what is it Zborfsky?" asked Chris.
[MMK begins writing on the bristol board with a black marker.]
> "Just a pair of demons rumored to be locked by the Key of Youth, but
>they haven't been seen for over five thousand years, since the Great
>Flood supposedly," said Zborfsky.
[MMK places the sign on the stand. It reads "PLOT POINT".]
MMK: I AM BEING SUBTLE!
VID: Yes, thank you.
> "Do you really believe that bull?" asked Chris. "C'mon Zborfsky! I'm
>heading back to base!"
[GAVOK falls off his chair.]
GAVOK: Crippled... by... the irony!
> "Well, I'll see you at practice Chris, right?"
>
> "Hopefully," said Chris, "if I make it back alive this time..."
>
>
>
MARK: Well, *what*, then?
> "We've finally cornered you, Master So," said Alex Getney. "You will
>work for Necrosaro now."
MARK <Alex>: And for minimum wage and benefits! Haha!
> "No way, kid," said Master So. "There's no way a kid like you can
>defeat an eighth degree Black Belt!"
[TIFF slaps her forehead.]
MMK: This is the story's equivalent of "things can't possibly get any worse".