I have so much respect for you guys. I'm a bit interested in this sort of thing but if ever I see pictures of women naked (even naturists) I just have lustful thoughts so I don't see how I could ever participate in social nudity. How did you conquer this? Or is it just an upbringing/genetic thing, and I'll never be able to overcome it?
Both society and the way most of us males are programmed by nature play a part.
You'd be surprised, if you can bring yourself to be around a group of nudist via a visit to a "park" or participation in a non-landed activity or even to a nude beach, that this will deprogram you to some extent. I won't say that desire won't be there, but it'll be different. You likely won't even get a "woody". Try it.
Our society encourages this desire by repressing nudity or making it seem like certain body parts are only for sex and not for viewing.
I am on the younger end of the nudist spectrum, 27. I used to have similar feelings (and still do to a lesser extent) when running into pictures on the computer. However, if you actually show up at a club, there is a social aspect that clearly takes over - deprogramming as Ralph put it. This has helped me build a more rational attitude toward the interplay between sex and nudity. I haven't been in it (nudism) long enough to claim more than that. For that social side to take over, I would suggest going to a club activity. I tried the beach and everytime I got into a conversation with someone, it was just great - no sexual feelings. Times when I was by myself initially, I struggled a bit. In the beach, people tend to avoid young single men - we just have to swallow that pill. In a club, they are forced to say a few niceties, and then they realise that I am an honest but unfortunately a young(er) single guy, some of them warm up. You can read about this all you want, but ultimately you need to take a step of faith, a step of reasonable faith. Give it a try and let us know what happened.
Hello Anonymous
(Actually, you can make up a screen name--more personal that way).
My first exposure to public social nudity was in 1999 on a remote beach in Hawaii. I had fiercely debated with myself over going nude as had my two male friends. I agonized over what God would want and my own fears and couldn't make up my mind.
As I stood there, I suddenly noticed a naked young woman appear about 25 yards away coming up from the small waterfall where we bathed and got our water. Raising her arms over her head, her unfurled sarong fluttered in the breeze as she laughed and did a pirouette in the morning sun. Then her male companion, also nude, joined her and walked down the path toward me.
As I watched them, I was struck with awe at the beauty I was privileged to behold. Suddenly, in my mind the words, "It's alright to be human," formed, followed with the thought that God truely approves of us, just as we are. An impression of closeness with the created world and God entered my being.
In a few moments, the couple stoped about 10 feet from me, unaware of my presence. As I watched, the woman still topfree, noticed me and smiled. They then casually walked down the trail.
As I reflected on what I had witnessed, I was struck by the fact that I was not sexually aroused, there was no erection, no lustful thought. In that moment, I knew. Off came my shorts and I enjoyed the next three days nude, never feeling so free.
It is almost universally true that having an erection in a naturist setting is just a fear, and not a reality. The atmosphere, expectation, and practice is not erotic where naturist's gather.
Everyone has to discover this for theirself. However, millions over the last 100 years with whom my testimony is added, share this experience as being non erotic.
(I'm the 'anonymous' who posted the starter message, btw.) Thanks everyone for your comments. It's likely to be a long time (if ever) before I can 'give it a try'; I posted here because I was generally pretty confused about the whole thing. But thanks everyone for your help, I'm now somewhat less confused (I think).
I often chide God for his cruel sense of humor. He made us guys stimulated sexually by sight. Then he goes and makes women so darn beautiful. HaHa, very funny! If he had only made them ugly, we could handle it better.
Everyone is right. If you give it a shot, you will find that your fears are not as great as you think. I would add that you might ask God to help you with this problem. I had it too and, with the Lord's help, I am not bothered by it anymore. Oh sure, if I come across some really hard core porn, showing just everything, I might have "those thoughts," but just to see a woman naked, either in the flesh (yep, a pun) or picture, I just enjoy the beauty.
Our society has cursed us and got us to believe that once we are a certain way, we are stuck that way.
Our minds are very powerful and can make us believe anything. Including shame. Fear is the biggest killer out there. Fear destroys freedom.
You are allowing what others tell you about yourself. Are you willing to overcome fear? Are you willing to change the way you think? Are you willing to step out in faith?
You believe your enemies more than you do your own friends. "Enemies" being anyone who tries to destroy your faith and courage. Friends don't let friends live in fear.
I had a lot of apprehension when my wife and I first went to a resort. But it was amazing how much we got used to it. In fact, I felt so free that I was more afraid to put my clothing back on and leave because I was afraid that we would not be coming back again! Now how is that for being afraid?
Of course, I have long since overcome that one, but you see the sudden difference in our thinking? In the morning, we were apprehensive, but within a few minutes, you couldn't get me to put my clothes back on! Don't let hours keep you from doing what would take only minutes to overcome.
I believe that there are at least two aspects to this statement:
One, that we must ourselves make the decision, _daily_, to act and think how God desires us to. At first this will have to be a conscious choice, because the way God wants us to be is contrary to our natural impulses. Over time though, these ways of being will become a part of us, and will come (more) naturally.
Two, that we need to ask God to change the way that we think. Again, a daily thing. I look back at who I used to be, and am amazed at the changes that God has made in me. It had to be Him, 'cause those differances are so outside of who I used to be, I would never have been able to become "me" on my own.
Anyway, just my thoughts, for whatever they're worth.
Are absolutely true! We need to renew our minds daily and make sure we are doing it with a consious effort! Even though we are making the consious effort, it is still Christ who makes it happen! Our efforts are in vain if not for the Christ. He has the cleaning agents, we only have dirty water to wash with.
It is true that we are "stuck that way" as long as we are human, in our human nature, but Jesus is the one who "unstucks" us!
My Dear, first we all have been taught to by all means avoid having or giving a look at some parts of the body lest something unknown, unexperienced, never given proof of, but just unthinkable, horrible could occur -this mere superstition was upheld also by educators, officials and judges. Just be properly and sufficiently clothed - this was a matter of the early Jewish society (see Josephus Flavius on
the story of Thamar), by the Europaean society until about 1980 and in your coutry till now (see the Janets breast - affair) , also for some 2000 years in China.- - That fosters simply being very curious and multiplies the tension.
Second we remember words of the Bible and I am convinced this is right. The New testament uses one important term "epithymia", also in form of the verb and the adverb, nearrly everywhere peiorative (exception Lk 22 : 15), known als "lust",
meaning a strong desire, a craving for something forbidden or simply inordinat(so Bauer/Danker Greek - English Dictionary I wholeheartly cann approve), something that requires your active role towards the object of your desire. Now you can get a look, have a look, have a pleasant look - but that by far is not a craving desire.
The limitation and the remedy in the New Testament is "egkrateia", also in the verb and the adjective form, meaning self-control, a (controling) power in yourself, translated as purity, temperance or chastity in the KJV.
So cope with both - successfully : With the curiosity stirred up artificially and with the tendencies in yourself by practicing honest self - control and find to a balance full of joy and delight.
(We are nudists since the sixties and enjoy this with gratitude to the Creator: The vacation on the beach and the weekly leisure time in the sauna/spa)
(Have my paper on cultures and nudity on request : svrcg@chello.at; 115 KB)
Greetings, blessings GSS
