I'm only 23, yet I feel as if I'm having a not-so-midlife-crisis. The further I get into this semester, I am realizing that teaching in a formal classroom isn't really what I want to do. Because of this I will most likely not come back to school here after I graduate this May to finish my Post-Bacc student teaching.

Instead of education, I have decided to go to a junior college a couple hours north of here to get a certificate in Surgical Technology. ST's are the ones that prep patients for surgery and get all the instruments and materials ready for the operation, as well as generally assist the surgeon during the operation. I'm excited, but quite nervous about this move. It will be the first time that I will be truely on my own in a new place. My parents will be 2 hours further away (as opposed to the 45 minute drive now), and all my friends will be staying here at school. Even tho I'm 23, I don't really want to grow up yet. I have really awesome parents that are completely willing to support me while I go to school until I am able to get a job. God has definitely blessed me with that. I'm just a little hesitant about getting my own apartment and being more...adult, I suppose. One good thing about moving is that I will be able to continue kickboxing under my current teacher. At the end of the semester, he will be moving back to the same town, which is his hometown. I don't want it to seem like I'm stalking him...but when I was looking up ST programs around the area, this town and the one I'm moving two were the two closest. The one that I'm moving to will actually be cheaper for me to attend than the local one, plus I think the education would be a little better.

Well, this is what I've been fretting over lately...last night I stayed up until about 4am worrying about whether or not this is really what I need to do with my life. I would definitely appreciate any prayers. If nothing else, just for God to give me peace and take control of situation. I think my parents have become comfortable with the decision for me to move and my dad wants to make a trip to check out apartments. That is going to be a little nerve racking...but I suppose everybody has their first "real world" moment. Alright, I suppose I should get back to school stuff. Hmm...maybe my kickboxing instructor would take pitty on me and let me hang out with him until I made a few more friends... Ok, I gotta go...Happy Lent-ing to all!

Good luck, Laura.

I couldn't wait to get away from home when I left to go to university. Went to OU, which is about 80 miles from Stonewall, OK.

We just had a "pounding" for a family. She is an OR nurse. Their house wasn't ready; so we pounded them in the fellowship room of the church building.

Ralph

My brother went to OU. Played in the band for a couple of years while he pursued a degree in aviation. Now he's a campus minister at KU.

God is leading you to where he wants you to be. And yes, it will be uncomfortable and scary. That is why faith and courage is required. The holy spirit will provide you with that.

We all face these fears, even in our middle age, which, btw, I feel like I have been going through myself the last year or three. I am 47 and feeling like I lost my way. But God knows where I am and I need to trust him. So you are in good company here.

May God bless you and keep you, may the holy spirit commune with you and give you the encouragement you need and may the grace of Jesus Christ flood your life.

Boyd Allen
"May the Lord protect our nudity from the sight of those who will not benefit, and may he allow us to be seen by those who will."

It's scary and uncomfortable, but that just means that you're thinking - always a good thing. If you weren't nervous but only excited, that would be bad.

God knows where He wants you to be, and sometimes listening to Him and following His directions will be difficult, but that's how you will grow in your faith.

It's like lifting weights- after a while your body becomes strong enough to not strain when lifting a certain weight. Your muscles stop growing. When we get comfortable where we are, and things are easy or predictable, we no longer have to depend on God and our faith stops growing. We become stagnant, and for many of His purposes, useless.

Pray, listen to what God tells you, listen to your parents and other mature Christians, and see what you feel led to do. God WILL speak to you, but you need to really listen, because it will be in a "still, small voice". It's that small voice whispering to you from the back of your mind that you need to heed.

Trust me- you'll do great. We all have faith in you.

Later
God Bless
Kevin

Right now it seems as though all that keeps coming through my mind has been self doubt. I know that this is from being around my sister. While I loved her so much when I was younger, I have grown further apart from her as I've gotten older. It seems that all the choices that I make are unsatisfactory to her and I don't have a chance of ever being good enough at whatever I choose to do. This hurts because I love her as my sister, and I want her to be proud of me and happy for me. It just never seems that she is able to settle for what I desire to do. I haven't yet asked her what her opinion of my decision is. I want to call and ask, but there is that fear inside of me that she will only have negative things to say (like any other time we talk). I don't know how to change things between her and I. I want things to be better but I can't expose myself to that much negativity. It wouldn't help me get on with my life, which is what I need to do.

You wrote of your sister, "I haven't yet asked her what her opinion of my decision is."

Maybe she is looking to respect you by you NOT asking her what her opinion is. If she did say something negative, would you follow her advice? Or would you consider it negative and ignore her advice?

If you follow her advice, she may be giving bad advice, and you made the wrong choice based on someone elses idea of who and what you should be.

But if you ignore her, then why bother asking her for advice in the first place? She knows you won't follow it, so why get her involved?

You can be close in other areas of your life, you can SHARE your life with her, but she cannot come in to pick it apart. If you shared a nice sweater that you enjoyed wearing, and she started to pick it apart, would you continue to share other sweaters with her? If this life is what you want and feel God is leading you there, then you may share that life with her, but don't allow her to pick it apart and destroy it or you. She has no right to do that.

She is not working your job, she is not paying your bills, she is not cooking your meals, she is not doing your laundry, she is not praying your prayers for you. You are responsible to God and to your parents. If your parents are out there encouraging you to move forward, (dad helping you find the right apartment is a good sign) then it's none of anyone elses business, including your sister, what you do.

Love her by sharing your life with her, inviting her in, but not allowing her to pick your home apart. Be excited about your life! Your excitement alone should tell her that you are not asking her for permission or advice. You can ask for advice if you want to, but by all means, don't let that be your final answer. Thank her and say, "I'll give it some thought" or ask another question that will make her think about her original answer. She may start respecting you more if she realizes you got a head on your shoulders and a life to live!

YOU be positive all the time around her. Dont feed her negativity by being negative as well. Youe example of continuing the positive life may be what she needs more than you needing her. She needs you to be the strong person now. Maybe God is calling YOU to help and encourage her! I know it's hard work and I find myself fighting the negativity all the time. But it has to be done in order to keep our life in tune with what God wants.

Now I need to follow my own advice!

Boyd Allen
"May the Lord protect our nudity from the sight of those who will not benefit, and may he allow us to be seen by those who will."

Beautifully stated, Boyd, and absolutely correct.

Laura, I don't think that you'll find advice much better than that.

God Bless you
Kevin

I've never felt the need for positive reinforcement for others in decisions I've made. Maybe I erred in not seeking advice of others rather than listening to myself and God. My wife, in particular, seemed to go along with anything that I wanted to do. Now, she seems to give me more a piece of her mind, and we do talk about things before doing them. Many of our siblings (and wives) early in life just don't have enough experience base to offer good judgement. It's now later in life that I know that my wife has a large experience base to offer advice from. So I listen to her.

Some siblings or parents will never be completely happy with what you do. If they love you, they'll support you, but it they really know something wrong about what you're choosing to do, in love they should speak up. Unless you decide to do something way out of line, most folks won't have any background information to give to you though. They'll just have opinions.

I made some wrong decisions in stuff that I did. Shouldn't have gone off to Princeton because I quit after realizing that they just weren't what I wanted, but I met my wife there. That was far better than another degree.

I shouldn't have taken that job at Nuclear Fuel Services that lost my draft deferment, but I ultimately got a lot of valuable experiences in the army and Vietnam. We even learned how to ski at Kissing Bridge just south of there and enjoyed skiinng for a number of years. I worked under a doctor in Vietnam who later became 3 star general in charge of the whole medical corps. Still keep in touch with him.

So, any decision you make or thing that happens to you in life can turn into a good thing. Go with your heart.

Ralph