....are the evidence of healed wounds. This was the subject of today's sermon by a guest pastor. Some of the main points are...when you have a wound, apply pressure to stop the bleeding. Cover the wound with bandage. Leave the wound alone. In the real world when we have a wound, apply pressure with prayer. Pray for yourself and also the one who caused the wound. Cover the wound with love, for love covers a multitude of sins. Leave it alone, because a wound that is messed with constantly will never heal.
Scars are the evidence of experience, what we have learned throughout our lives, what we have endured. I have several scars from little accidents that I had up until this point, and one surgical scar. Every one of them is a reminder of a trial in my life, and a lesson learned.
The pastor told a story of a boy in florida that wanted to go swimming, so he stripped his clothing and got into the water. After some time his father saw an allagater coming for the boy. The father ran for the boy telling him about the gator, but it was too late. The legs of the boy was in the gator's mouth, but the father had the boy's arms. It was a tug between man and beast until a passerby heard the noise and saw what was happening and shot the gator. The boy spent several weeks in the hospital recovering, during this time a reporter came by. He knew of the event and the marks left by the gator, but he noticed some deep scars on the boy's arms. The reporter asked the boy about the marks on his arms to which the boy replied "those are the marks where my father would not let go".
What story does your scars tell? how about your spiritial scars? This has made me think today, and I imagine I will for some time to come.
It was so plain and simple today. God just grabbed my attention and then stuck it to me. lol
Now, I'm not even married, but as I was getting ready for church this morning I saw an televangelistic infomercial for www.marriagetoday.com. The guy was talking about how driving with his wife was just absolutely horrible because she would complain about him pulling out in front of people that were too close and various other things. And then finally one day he just had had enough of the complaining and decided to do everything how his wife wanted it done. At the end of the day, he realized that he really just needed to start listening to how the things he did effected his wife. She needed to be able to trust in his ablility to protect her and calm her, which he hadn't been doing before. What an epiphany! I think this is such a eye opening realization, not only for married couples but for all relationships, regardless of nature. One person has to be able to realize what effect they are having upon the other person. That was a light bulb moment, for me in that I have to look for that characteristic in people that I surround myself with.
Then, no...it's not over yet, the sermon at church was about divorce. Now...I'm not married, nor have I ever been married, so it really seems like God was speaking to me through some awkward channels today. Anyway, the bottom line of the sermon was that nothing but God puts together a marriage - not the government or churches or people. Nothing but God - and nothing but God should be able to take those marriages apart, therefore divorce is something that we *shouldn't* do, however, it's not something that we *can't* do. I'm sorry if divorce is a touchy subject with anyone, but for some reason, this sermon really caught me off guard. I realized that I really do need to be able to whole-heartedly trust in the man that I choose to make my husband and that if I ever tell myself,"eh,if it doesn't work out then I can just get divorced..." then I just shouldn't go there to start with.
Well...I hope that didn't offend anyone, and if it did, I'm sorry...but God really did bonk me over the head today.
I can understand a little compromise to make a marriage run more smoothly. However, sometimes the compromising is all one-sided. My second wife constantly criticized EVERYTHING I said and did. I couldn't say or do ANTHING right. I got tired of that after less than a year and we separated. Everything had to be her way, or she made life unbearable.
I heard a sermon about a couple who was planning on getting married. They were discussing the issue of divorce because they heard that so many got divorced that they wondered what they can do to avoid it.
So that sat down with a lawyer and made some rules of do's and don'ts.
They will live in a certain neighborhood, with a certain house, drive a certain type of car, never let the gas go under a quarter of a tank, use certain type of gas.
the list continues to every aspect of their lives they both agreed on in advance. What schools their kids were going to (two of them, not three or one), what church they would go to.
They made the rules to where if they break these rules, that would be grounds for divorce and they signed the agreement.
I"m sure they just guaranteed that they will get the divorce, not prevent it.
And the pastor continued with the story and said that is the agreement God made with Isreal, pointing out that rules like this will more likely cause divorce, cause a rift because they are so strict, so demanding and it does not allow for the flow and ebb of life and changes in life.
When God divorced Isreal (for her continuing to run to other gods, adultry) God did not find himself free to remarry as we do in this country. His law was "till death do you part" so died he did, in Jesus Christ.
But now, our relationship is not using those old rules that did not work. All those rules did was point out how messed up we are. Just like the prenuptual agreement the couople made to try to avoid divorce, they just used all the things that caused divorce to guide them. All the "thou shall nots" did not allow for our hearts to grow and pull us together. Our relationship was with the law, not God.
Under the new covenant, God said "I will write my laws in their hearts, and I will be their God and they will be my people". Not the ten commandments, but the law of Love.
Love overcomes all evil. Love overcomes divorce. Divorce is a choice you make and loving the one your with is a daily life struggle. Yes, it can be a struggle, you fight, you argue, but you love each other.
Not listening is the number one problem we have today. Any day. We are so busy waiting for them to shut up enough so we can jump in and have our say, which they are not listening to because they are mad at you for "interupted" them.
And it goes both ways. Our job is to understand the other person, not to be understood (thats for both sides).
Marriage is a full time job, and there is no day off. No nights off, no vacations from it. 24/7 It's like breathing, you stop breathing, you die, you stop being married, you marriage dies.
When God created Eve, he took a piece of him, and I heard that it was not just a "rib" though it would be symbolic; God took one side of Adam. God created "man" but was not "male" until God took one side of him out.
Male and Female he made them. She was "flesh of my flesh and bone of my bone". He recognized her as his other half (better half?).
That is why God says that "we become one flesh". It is putting male and female back together again and making one "man".
Marriage is not a "convenience" package. Some think that marriage is a legal form of prostitution. They would think of marriage as a reason to have sex.
that is also why I worry about people who still are ashamed to be naked in front of each other. They are one flesh for crying out loud! They SHOULD be naked and unashamed around each other! It's almost like saying "I don't want to see myself in the mirror!" She is you and you are her. He is you and you are him". We are one. Yet individual, like the Trinity.
The trinity is one, an eternal exchange of love, and marriage helps us understand that, yet the trinity is made up of three separate intities, The Father, Son and holy spirit. We are invited into that eternal exchange of love, and marriage helps us understand that.
We need to have eternal exhcange of love within our marriage, including our children. Obviously, we are not talking about sex here. Love.
Well, Laura, at least you know these things now, before you're married, instead of having to learn them the hard way, through several tough years of marriage, like, uh... ME!!
I'm greatly blessed, 1 marriage, 27 years and still going.
Yes, you need to take into consideration how your actions affect others. But, if you live a life of total compromise you only build bitterness. My wife cannot understand my preference for nudity. If it were up to her this would be eliminated from my life. Instead I respect her right not to partiicipate, even though she knows she is invited to join me. If I lived my life totally by her preferences she would probably get bored with me and I would be a nervous wreck. She also has activities that I choose not to join her in, though I am invited to do so. We do purposely seek activities that interest both of us.
Long statement to make say, compromise is part of any good relationship but not to the point of giving up who you are.
Divorce is a painful reality. Enter the marriage covenant carefully and with acommittment to love. 1 Cor 13.
Who you marry will be the second most inportant decision you will ever make.
