I have a question for the friends and experts on this site. Several times I have seen clues that make me think certain people may be nudist. Some I know well and sometimes it is strangers that have tell-tale signs. My question is, would it be polite to come out and ask them. I try to put myself in their shoes and think about how I would feel. I also think about what I would say if asked such a very delicate question.
One day I was at the mall watching my kids play in the romper room. A lady sat down nearby and after a while her kids and mine were playing together. She told me that shoes should be outlawed. I responded that my dream was to be on a island wearing as little as possible. She agreed very wholeheartedly and I got the impression that her household may be similar to mine. I wonder how many fellow nudists cross paths without even knowing about each other. BTW, with the popularity of tanning beds you can't use tan lines as an indicator.
Big grizzly bare
That is a good question, and many times I kicked my naked butt for not at least dropping a hint here and there myself, if not asking outright.
You could say something like, "even nudist resorts don't outlaw shoes...everything else maybe, but not shoes". See what they say in response to your nudist resort.
1. They understand that you are a fellow nudist because you said "resort" not "colony".
2. They may find it interesting that you mentioned nudist resort and want to know more.
3. They may look at you funny and say "geez, I didn't mean that! Shoes off is as far as it goes".
You can give facts within the context of your conversation, without saying "come, be a nudist with me", or "you don't wear shoes? You must be a nudist!"
Of course, that last line, I was going over the bar a tad, and that you are way more careful than that, but you can come up with clever out takes that can prompt more questions or they ignore it.
One of my favorites when someone comments about me wearing sandals where regular shoes are more common (at church for example), or maybe when I am barefoot when shoes or sandals, again, are more accepted, I would say, "Your lucky I'm wearing clothes!"
Usually they either laugh or ignore it. I have not found fellow nudists this way yet, but it did not hurt our relationship! And it also takes the pressure off your ability to say without saying.
You came close when you mentioned the island. That was a good one! But adding to her comment about outlawing shoes would have put it back into her court again, such as nudist resorts don't even outlaw them. That is when you get personal without pushing it, but getting her to think about her comment in a new light.
- If you're too direct, if you come right out and say that you suspect that he/she might be a nudist, and you're looking for confirmation, then you risk offending the person through presumption.
- If you're too indirect ... well, that could be even worse. It could come across as "looking for someone" to practice nudism with. Or he/she might even think that you're not really interested in nudism, but are bring up nudism as a way to steer the conversation toward something else.
If you can avoid those two extremes (too direct or too indirect/nebulous) then you might be alright.
And, of course, it depends hugely on the circumstances.
BTW, if anyone else has any experiences with telling someone you're a naturist, and/or asking them if they are, that you'd like to share, I know I for one would be very interested to hear them. (I'm afraid I personally don't have too many experiences in that area.)
Since I'm pretty avid about barefooting the last few years and I've always loved to hike. (which I wish I could do more of, but this thing called a career gets in the way) I would have steered the conversation to hiking barefoot, then onto how great it is to find a skinnydipping hole out in the middle of nowhere. Just watch their reaction and go from there.
In my experience it all depends on the person, the moment and the situation. Once I complimented a singer friend I was just getting acquainted with on her dress. She said at once, "It's my default dress." I asked about that curious expression, and it soon became clear that "default" meant she wore it when she had to wear anything. I said, "You'd make a good nudist," and she replied, "I already am." (But that was a special situation. This woman talks about anything to anybody. Literally! lol )
From Jochanans response about this lady who would talk about anything to anybody, "But that was a special situation. This woman talks about anything to anybody. Literally! lol" then I guess she would be the one to ask such a question about our forwardness. She has no problem with being forward and honest. After all, isn't honesty the virtue we seek? And she apparently isn't hurt by it, or doesn't let anyone's negativity to get to her.
(But that was a special situation. This woman talks about anything to anybody. Literally! lol )