Hello,

I very much need some advice and I do not feel like I have encountered
the right person to ask for it. After reading about this site I believe you all
may be able to help me.

A brief background. I finished a PhD in Pharmacology in 1992 at age
26. Afterwards I took a postdoc in Pharmacokinetics followed by a
biopharmaceutics reviewer job at the FDA where I worked a total of 3
years. My first year there I had some strange health problems
eventually diagnosed as Menieres disease which led me to change course
from shooting for a drug company job to taking something closer to my
hometown. This experience led me to believe I was not a good candidate
for job hopping around the country to various drug companies as most my
friends planned to do and have done now. I felt I should be closer to
home in case I got sick again. So I took a job at my hometown
University in the biology department.

I remained there for 5 years until my health problems resurfaced and
became so bad I could not drive, walk and more. At that time I was
teaching in the biology department and also co teaching Pharmacology
for NPs. I had also begun work on my RN. My plan was to get my NP and
try to get a duel appointment where I could continue to teach anatomy
and teach in the NP course as well. I lost the hearing in my right ear
and I am in the process of getting a BAHA. Of course, I had to leave
my job. After years of being mostly bedridden I was diagnosed with
celiac disease, changed my diet and started improving. Later I was
diagnosed as also having Lyme disease. I started improving much more
within a month of being treated for Lyme disease and continued to be
treated for years. My balance receptors on the right side were
destroyed by gentamycin early on.

Finally, my main problems I am left with are Basilar Artery Migranes
which have similar symptoms to a menieres attack. However, I do not
have vertigo anymore due to the gentamycin injections. I still get an
aura and then about 45 minutes later I may or may not have an attack of
imbalance. I also am single sided deaf and have diffuse joint pain
flare-ups. But the later are controllable now. The BAHA will give me
sound on the right side. The migranes are the bummer but have reduced
in frequency as I approach menopause just as I was told they would. I
am 46.

I have been on Social security disablity now for 9 years. I believe at
this point if I can get to the point where I can get my NP and get back
into a university or even a drug company I will be ok. the problem is
I do not know if I can handle years of being a floor nurse. This job,
at least where I am located, is the most stressful occupation I have
ever seen and not because of patients. The working conditions are
horrendous. The nurses are the whipping boys. It is incredible the
things they are written up for, not being able to read a physican's
handwriting, not being able to find a proper fitting gown for a child
(there is not a clean one on the floor) ,etc. I have never encountered
anything like it. The staff was very competitive with one another and
very condescending to us. I felt like everything was a "pissing
match". Please excuse the term but I don't know how else to put it.

While I saw some things that were not quite right going on at the
University, it was nothing like this. So how in the world would
someone with a disability survive in a setting like this ? I don't see
how it is possible.

I am allowed to make a small amount of money while on disability and
was thinking maybe to start I could just work part time. But, who
would hire me? Would anyone hire me?

I feel like i have so much to offer and I am so excited to feel better
then I have. But am I making a big mistake? Everyone tells me go for
it but theydon't understand what they are telling me to go for. Is it
doable? I was hoping I could introduce more Pharmacology and kinetics
into a nursing program somewhere and I think it would be fun and
useful.

I am sorry this is so long. Any insight you have for me would be
spectacular!

JC

In my opinion you will get hired. Back when I went to school everyone said you needed to do floor nursing for 2 years. That is not the general belief any longer. There are soooo very many opportunities in nursing now. I am handicapped. I worked in nursing 30 years, then became handicapped from a physician who was not paying attention to me after surgery...but that is a long story. Having been a nurse executive/administrator for 25 years, I know you could get hired. Like I said, there is pharmacy sales, Insurance nurses, suryeyors,nurses that help attorneys with research, coding, and on and on. Just about every area you think about has a nurse connected, even NASCAR racing and football arena's and Helicoptor's. Chin up...buckle down and reach your dream!

Thank u so much for the response and info. its my second day of school and i needed the boost

I can truly relate to the dilemma. I too have witnessed some of the things that some nurses do. I became a nurse before I acquired my disability. Through many struggles I remain a nurse. It is in my heart and part of me. I cannot do all of the things I did before. I have learned that I can do so much more because of what I have been through. The answers are not easy, but there are nurses out there who encourage others. Nurses that teach and are not afraid of what they don't know but embrace life because of what they do know. These people are true nurses. Follow the example of the nurses who do the right thing not because of what is expected of them, but what they expect from themselves and others. There you will find in your own heart the answers to the questions you seek. Jesus said "It is not easy, but it is worth it".