The Rundown: Anarchy in the U.K Pre-Show [April 2006]
by Gojinn [King of RunDowns]
The stage lights up, and Gojinn rushes out onto the left side of the stage, running up the stairs, to a pre-made set for him. He stands on his throne, and screams at the crowd.
Ladies and gentlemen of Dublin!
Uno, dos, tres... catorce
Give them the welcome they deserve in Ireland! Stand the fuck up and scream for…
U2!!!
The crowd goes insane!! The ring blazes with lights, and from above it, a stage is lowered slowly, and stays in midair, letting the band play live for the pre-show! That’s right!
WELCOME TO THE ONE AND ONLY, LIVE PRE-SHOW!
The King is live, and so is U2, for the greatest pre-show to have EVER existed in the DWF or any other sport, and here I am to discuss the upcoming event tonight, ANARCHY IN THE U.K!
Gideon
Kade
Street Fight
Well here I am clueless as always as to who someone is. It starts to annoy me when this happens, because SOME people know a guy, others are left with a “Who the fuck is this guy?” kind of look, and right now I’m wearing it. Gideon seems to already have a grudge with the guy, so right away you know he’s done something to piss off God himself or something.
Then there’s Gideon, savior of us all I guess, or some shit. Guy resurfaces after all this time and after all his ass-kickings, and he still doesn’t get that he needs to step back and not start shit with people! GIDEON! RELAX! If you start wars on all fronts, you’re bound to lose A LOT of battles. Just a thought buddy!
Gideon and Brother Carson
The DemonLords
(Jeremy Nottingham, Nobody, Crymzon Payne)
#1 Contendership Match – Tag Team Titles
Well here we go! Currently it looks to me like a literal Heaven vs Hell match, but unfortunately for both Carson and Gideon, none of these boys have quite gone one on one, and they don’t even know who their opponents are! It could be any combination of Nottingham, Nobody, and Crym! Carson better be aware, these guys aren’t any Jack E. Breaker by far, but they’re damn tough in their own rights. If he’s not careful, he’ll get caught off guard again, and taken under. Let’s not forget Gideon either, he might just get…buried by the competition.
For those of you who didn’t pick up on that, I was eluding to the time I buried Gideon with a monster of a dump truck in a Graveyard Match. He thinks he’s so much better. Psssh, I wasn’t the one pressed into a tiny hole for hours while they dug him out…heh…
Back to the topic, Crymzon Payne is a good fighter. I’m been in the ring with him before as a teammate, and, when he’s not running away from Cerberus and Jack E. Breaker to fight other people he can still be a shitty teammate. Then again, he was teaming with a King, so I understand, the pressure is intense! You’re forgiven Crymzon, after all, I was the one who eliminated you in last years War Games, right? Hahahaha...
Nottingham and Nobody seem to have a lot to prove here in this match. So far we’ve seen some great skill from both men in matches…but all three of you better be warned, Irish Style and the Outsiderz, are NOT happy about that fucking stunt you pulled. Watch your backs.
Rage (c)
Nobody
Hardcore Championship Match
The action just doesn’t stop! To tell you the truth, we all know the combination for the previously mentioned tag match, don’t we? If Nobody even has a shot at beating my boy Rage, he’s gonna need rest, so I don’t see him facing two men in a tag match JUST before!
Nobody and Rage have a strong past apparently, so this match is for all the marbles. It’s all about the gold on Rage’s waist, and Nobody has destroyed Cark in his trek to get it, so next up seems to be the man he’s wanted for some time now, Rage.
Rage is the Outsiderz beast, and soon to be 1/2 of the World Tag Team Champions! The guy is huge, and ready to stomp ass at any given moment! It’s beautiful! Nobody needs to watch his ass and be ready for Rage, because with no restraints in a Hardcore match, he’ll do what he wants, when he wants.
Then again, we’ve seen Nobody kick some ass as of late, and if that was any indication of what is to come, then this match is sure to be a …SLOBBERKNOCKER!
Jack E. Breaker
Viper
Six Sides of Steel Match
Oh how I’m BEGGING for death in this match! I hate ‘em both folks, can you blame me?
Viper is a skilled vet, and she knows her shit in the ring, but then again, she faced a supposed retard that couldn’t fight his way out of a paper bag, Red Spyder, who stomped a mud hole in her ass unfortunately, and walked away with my..*cough* I mean, her gold. Well, she’s good I guess, but that still remains to be seen. On this little U.K tour we have, she has to face the KING!
Jack E. Breaker is on a roll as of late in the delivering of ass-kickings. After his performance against Brother Carson, I assume he’s ready to deliver a whole new kind of pain to Viper, and show her who’s boss. In truth, I’m pulling for Jack…but I HATE you both, so fuck that. You can both fall to your deaths from the top of the cage. Have fun beating each other just for the satisfaction. I’ll be watching and laughing, and enjoying the whole thing. And when I say, I’m going to watch, you know I’m going to.
Irish Style
The Emerald Flame - Big Joe & The Crimson Tear – Generation X
The Outsiderz
The Beast – Rage & The King - Gojinn
World Tag Team Championship Match
w/ Special Referee: Viper
Like that camera guy? The little names before Rage and I? I thought that’d be cool because the other two are Flame and Tear, so I thought we needed something special anyway.
He looks over to U2, still jamming.
MY GOD LISTEN TO THEM GO!!!
Whew, well…
The tag match of the century. FINALLY a tag team besides the Outsiders who actually want gold. Well guess what? It AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN FOLKS! The first names in history to wear DWF Tag gold will read, “The Outsiderz – Rage and Gojinn”!!
Gen X and Joe have proven to be a good team together, and we all know what happened last time. In fact, I saw all of you acting like a bunch of bitches in the ring lately. I have something to say about that.
Fuck you all! You know a goddamn draw when you see one! We all pinned each other! Stop mouthing off like you should be champions you cry baby fuckers!
Look at you Viper. You have the right to book, and surprise, surprise, you’re kissing ass with your power, just to gain some damn allies. Y’know, you’re really fucking pathetic. You know Irish Style can’t beat us, the ONLY real tag team around here, the Outsiderz! You know you’re going to help them! Please...you're never going to be fair at all.
And who the fuck are you calling cheaters?! Sure the Demon-fucks got involved, so they deserve the label I suppose, but where the hell did we cheat?! I know for damn sure it was a hardcore match, and in case you’ve taken one too many shots to the head lately, there are NO rules in those matches.
So fuck you Viper!! Fuck Irish Style!! Fuck them winning the belts!! You’d better believe I’m walking away holding 1/2 of those belts, and Rage will be walking away with the other!!
An infuriated Gojinn sits back, and breathes, going on to the next match.
Red Spyder(c)
Wolf
DWF Undisputed Championship
Okay Okay, settle down now. We all know Red won’t be letting go of that gold anytime soon easily, but we all know Wolf is a stubborn asshole too.I don’t see either of them giving in, in this match, but then again, I really don’t care! Let ‘em tear each other apart in this match! Less work for me to do if they kill each other. I’ll sit back and laugh.
I don’t know what else to say. Red is a new champion, and he’s held the belt before. I have no idea what to expect from these two, but whatever it might be, it’s NOT going to be pretty at all.
ALSO
We have appearances by yours truly, the Creature of the Moon, The Night Angel, Aggression General Manager Shane Lestat, and Stonecold Marco Ramirez!!
The event is jampacked and ready to EXPLODE. Ladies and gentlemen of Dublin, help me thank U2!!!
I gotta get going but WELCOME TO ANARCHY IN THE UK!!!!!!
Gojinn stands up, and pyro begins exploding all over his set and the stage as U2 finishes up. They step onto a small elevator that brings them back up, and leaves the stage there, hanging high above the ring. The six sides of steel are slowly lowered to where the stage is, in preparation for the match later. The Anarchy theme begins blaring and coverage is switched to J.R and the King as the PPV is ready to start!!!!
[OOC: I was torn between “Beautiful Day” and “Vertigo” lol Late I know, but it's barely started, so it should be on time techincally :P ]
