"I Got That Beat..."

by CF

I hated PE in junior-high and high school -- being effectively blind left me out of sportsball-type activities. (I could run a 6-minute mile, and the Track coach was all over my a** to join, but I hated the school enough to tell him to Get Bent.)

As a protest, in 7th grade, I bought a set of oversize gym clothes, and wore them every day, day-in and day-out, for the four school years I had to take PE (7th-10th grades incl.).

Notice I said I wore them -- I never said I washed them.

And this was the San Fernando Valley, CA, in the '80s -- normal temps in the 80s and 90s F.

I figured: "Hey -- if I'm going to be miserable, so is everyone else." >happy.gif

Finally, at the end of 10th grade, final day of PE ever, we got to go to the pool. I wore a special variant of my usual gym clothes (T-shirt; Sweat pants; shorts; socks; shoes; underwear -- no one wore jock straps, never mind what the rules said) -- I added a bottom layer of swim trunks.

The teacher had us do a 2-mile jog; at the end of which, I just kept doing laps, until he got the pool enclosure opened. Then I jogged off the track, down to the pool enclosure, and straight into the pool fully clothed.

I moved to the side of the pool where the shade was -- and where the girls (who never lifted a finger in PE, much less actually did what teacher said) were loafing around.

Here's what they saw: First, a shoe came out of the pool and landed on the deck near them; then another shoe; then a sock; then another sock; then the sweat pants; then the T-shirt; then the shorts (cue Girlish Giggling); then the underwear (cue Girlish Shocked Laughter).

Then I hurled myself out of the pool onto the deck.

Cue Girlish Shrieking.

Everyone turns to look -- and sees me in swim trunks, gathering up my clothes, saying "Ladies" in my best Southern-[Californian-]Gentleman manner, and walking away; leaving everyone wonder why they were Freaking Out.

I was planning on ceremonially burning my gym clothes after school, but the bag they were in disappeared at some point -- it's entirely possible they are Still Out There Somewhere.... >happy.gif

Posted on Sep 12, 2017, 1:46 PM

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  1. I'm sure someone put them to nefarious use. n/t. eddi, Sep 12, 2017

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