Today my sister and I went shopping and had wine and appetizers at a local restaurant. The place was nearly empty. We had my six month old nephew with us. In walked another Mom and Dad with a nine month old little girl.
The four adults talked across the restaurant the whole time. We spent over an hour having both babies play (rather, explore) with each other. We all talked about babies, babies, babies. This one had to sleep on her stomach, this one had acid reflux, this one does this, this one does that. It was cool to see my sister and this lady swap stories and totally agree that each baby is different and you can't religiously follow the "How To" books you read. Each one of them was insanely proud of their baby and each of them complimented the other on their parenting and knowing what's best for their child. It was a really lovely exchange. I suggested my sister and this woman trade names and phone numbers. They did. I think being a member of support boards has taught me the importance of reaching out. - Or putting yourself out there.
The real point of this story is... If this shopping/dining trip with this conversation happened just six months ago I would have been FURIOUS and devastated. 'How dare these people throw their fertility in my face when I'm just trying to have a nice afternoon', I would have thought. I would have held back my tears until I just barely got my front door shut. Then I would have been in the throws of depression for days. - Maybe weeks.
I took such joy in watching my nephew make his first friend. I was so proud of my sister for putting herself out there. I was so happy to see a stranger connect with us. I felt comfort seeing two wonderful mothers. I was glad they were mothers. I was so happy to be happy. Holy shit. This decision and commitment to build my family through adoption has done wonders for my soul.
Thanks for letting me share.
Background info: DH and I are close to completing our home study for domestic adoption.