Open adoption experiences? (new poster, child ment)

by kfx216 (no login)

I'm new here, so I'm sure this has been asked before, but I'm wondering what experiences people have had with open adoption, particularly those who already have a child.

Even though it is really the only option open to us (the old joke, I'm not gay but my partner is

, but that stil means international adoption is out), I am a little concerned for two reasons:

1) My DD is 3, so what would happen if we were matched and then the birthmom decided to keep the child. I think I could "position" it to my DD as "helping" until we knew for sure we'd get the child, but wonder if anyone else has had this experience.

2) I know that the birth parents give up their rights, but am concerned that since we are gay, our rights would be secondary to birth parents and/or birth family, even at a much later date.

My partner is very against open adoption for these reasons, but is also under the delusion that at (almost) 45 and after ttc off and on for 2 years I'm going to be able to pop out a second child. Open adoption seems to be the only option available to us and even then I'm concerned DD will be in kindergarden before we're matched. Any suggestions would be much appreciated. TIA!

Posted on Jun 5, 2008, 7:11 AM

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Re: Open adoption experiences? (new poster, child ment). Jess, Jun 5, 2008, 8:49 PM
Maybe I can help a little. Christiane, Jun 6, 2008, 3:31 PM
thanks - has anyone done open adoption?. kfx216, Jun 9, 2008, 4:11 PM

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