"This is SO annoying," muttered Tabby, clicking furiously on her mouse, which squeaked in protest. It was no use, of course, her screen wouldn't show any more than the very top of what she was sure were gorgeous pics of Iolaus and Ares.
She refreshed and reloaded any number of times, but nothing changed - all she got were tantalising glimpses of the blonde and raven curls on the top of Iolaus's and Ares' heads respectively. It was like a striptease, she decided, a cruel and unusual punishment, designed to send an Amazon right into the loony bin - if she wasn't already there!
"Grrrrr - this is SO not fair," Tabby growled, pushing up her sleeves in determination. "It's my birthday and I'm going to have pics of Iolaus and Ares to enjoy if it KILLS me!"
She consulted her bookmarks and decided that she'd visit some sites that she knew contained many stunning pics of her two hunks.
In no time at all she was sitting in her seat, open mouthed and horribly disappointed. Not one of the links would open!
"What's going on?" she whispered to herself.
"Nothing that I can't set right!" Trilled a sparkling voice from behind her.
Tabby spin in her chair so fast she nearly fell off. There wasn't supposed to be anyone else in the room! Her mouth opened even wider when she saw who the other occupant was.
The God of Love stood grinning benignly down at her, one hand on his hip and the other patting his dark curls coyly. At Tabby's continuing silence and staring, his smile faltered and a frown appeared. Nervously he looked around and down. "Does this make my butt look big?" He enquired, concerned.
Tabby cleared her throat. "Um - No! It looks - just fine," she assured him, bemused. "But what are you doing here?"
He brightened again. "Oh - I'm here to assist with part of your birthday celebrations," he confided, shaking his booty in delicious anticipation of what awaited Tabby. "And we're starting with an Amazonian version of The Price is Right!" He positively squealed as he clapped his hands together.
The Birthday Amazon swallowed. What on earth had the Birthday Brats gotten up to this time? She was afraid, very afraid. The God of Love sashayed forward and took her by an unresisting arm. "Oh don't worry - it's all going to be positively brilliant! It has to be - I was involved in the planning!" He told her as he waved his hand around them.
Immediately their surroundings changed, and Tabby found herself at the front of a large auditorium facing what appeared to be an audience of very excited Amazons and Hunters. She cringed. Oh no, the Brats had definitely had a hand in this, she just knew it. She extricated her hand from the God of Love's and tried to unobtrusively tiptoe away, but he was having none of that. Oh no. He giggled and hauled her back to the front of the auditorium.
"Welcome everyone to this VERY special birthday edition of The Price is Right! Our contestant is the ONE, the ONLY TABBY!!!!!!!" The God of Love introduced the Birthday Amazon with a flourish. Tabby gulped and smiled weakly, acknowledging the roar of approval from the crowd.
"Now, in this game, there are slightly different rules, because, you know, on your birthday you don't have to pay for ANYTHING, GoL announced shrilly. "Behind you, you'll find three doors, and behind each one there's a special gift for you, on your special day. Now, you can't have all of them at once," he admonished her seriously, "because, well...I was told you couldn't, so there!" He finished brightly.
"Well - thanks...I think," Tabby replied, bemused.
"Alrighty then, on with the show! So, Tabby, which door will you pick first? Choose carefully now!" The God of Love stood beside her watching intently, with hands pressed together in an anticipatory attitude as a drum roll filled the auditorium.
Tabby, who was anything but violent by nature, was at that very moment considering how best to do away with the Birthday Brats as much as she was considering which door to choose first.
The drum roll continued it's frenetic pace, not once faultering, as the Amazon looked at the doors and mused.
At length, she turned back to the God of Love, who had been preening and simpering at the audience. "Alright, I've chosen," she informed him in resignation. "Doorway number 2."
The God of Love squealed and clapped, jumping up and down on the spot. The eyes of several Amazons in the audience almost bugged right out of their heads as they saw what effect this had on the god. But Tabby's eyes were fixed on doorway no. 2, which was slowly opening. It got perhaps a third of the way open when it slammed shut again with a resounding CLAAAAAANG!!!! Immediately Doorway no. 1 began to open instead.
Tabby couldn't believe her eyes. There, behind no. 1, sat the most stunning car that she had ever seen, and standing right next to it stood the God of War. He was wearing his black leather pants and boots. And nothing else. With a smug glint in his eye, he sauntered forward until he came to stand in front of Tabby. "Your new chariot awaits, my dear. Shall we take her for a spin?" He asked silkily, before raising her hand and brushing the back of it with his full, ripe, luscious lips.
The Birthday Amazon blinked and swallowed, and allowed herself to be led away by Ares, to the roaring and cheering of approval from the audience.
The God of Love wiped away a tear of joy. "One down and two to go!" He quavered to the audience.
With a roar and the smell of burning rubber, Ares and Tabby left the auditorium and disappeared into the distance.
**************
Much MUCH later, the little lamborghini zoomed back into the auditorium and a dishevilled Tabby staggered out of the passenger's seat, while Ares strode to the centre of the stage and bowed, acknowledging the roar of the crowd. Tabby was furiously fanning herself to cool down, but it wasn't working. Yet another look at those black leather pants and their occupant and.... Well she knew she had a job to do and so she turned back to the three doors, one of which now stood open.
"I choose no. TWO!" She announced in a much firmer voice this time - dying to know what delights awaited her behind that door.
The door opened and there stood Iolaus, her favourite Golden Hunter. HE was wearing nothing but a blue speedo. It was the God of Love's eyes that bugged out this time. "Oh myyyyyy," he murmured, hand to mouth.
"Oh please," muttered the God of War, stalking off the stage.
Iolaus bounded forward and took Tabby in his arms and gave her a birthday - and a Christmas - and an Easter - and a Labour Day kiss. Tabby wasn't about to complain! At length Iolaus released her and grinned. "I hope you brought your swimming costume, Tabby - you look like you could do with some cooling down," he told her happily
The Birthday Amazon blushed. "Er, ah, Idon'thaveonewithme," she confessed, to another roar of approval from the crowd.
Iolaus smiled. "That's GREAT!" he exclaimed, quickly followed by, "Who said that?"
Tabby giggled at his antics, just as Iolaus swept her up in his arms and ran with her from the auditorium. The God of Love was wiping another tear from his eye. "It's so sweet," he sniffed.
It was well into the evening by the time Iolaus and Tabby arrived back, covered in sand, but it was obvious they'd had a whale of a time! Tabby had always wanted to ride on the back of whales and dolphins too!
Finally it was time to open the third door, and Tabby couldn't wait! If no. one and no. two had been that good, she knew no. 3 was going to be wonderful!
And she was right!
As the drum rolled, the door opened, and there stood a huge crowd of her friends surrounding the Birthday Brats as they wheeled out a giant birthday cake with candles all around the edges. It came to a halt in front of the Birthday Amazon, who was suddenly wearing the most stunning emerald green gown. A cymbal clashed suddenly and the cake erupted to reveal Ares wearing, well...birthday cake! "Would you like some cake," he invited her, his eyes smouldering.
As Tabby helped herself to some birthday cake, the Brats, in something vaguely resembling unison began singing.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR TABBY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tabby}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Have a truly wonderful day hon, filled with the nicest things that life can offer!
Warm hugs,
Kendaa
